“I do. I—I saw a guard and maid once. By accident.”
Kieran pulled her tighter against his chest as his hand snaked up to cup a breast while the other turned her chin.
“Maude, I don’t know that I can be gentle with you. I’ve imagined making love to you that way too many times, and I fear my overeagerness.”
“And if that’s not what I want? Gentleness, that is.”
“Perhaps you might listen to someone who has your best interests at heart.”
“And if my interest is to couple with my husband again?” She yanked the laces of her kirtle and dropped it and her chemise to the floor in an instant.
“That isn’t what I meant, and you know it.”
Maude grasped the bedpost they stood near and leaned forward, widening her stance. The image she presented to Kieran with her hips begging for his fingers to grip, her back arched and breasts swinging, and a look of naïve longing on her face as she looked back at him was the image of his dreams. As he admired the view, he caught Maude’s expression change into one of doubt and then humiliation. She released the bedpost and stood.
“Wait,” he hissed before guiding his cock into her. “I was enjoying the view. It’s perfection.” He groaned as he slid in to the hilt and pressed his hips forward. “I’ve fantasized of making love to you this way. You remember how a mon can ease his need when the woman he wants is not available.”
Maude gasped and pulled away. She twisted and pushed against his chest.
“How could you bring that up?” She was in tears, and Kieran realized his mother’s words about Maggie rang in her ears. “How could you tell me you went whoring?”
Despite guessing her train of thought, her accusation stunned Kieran, but it only took a moment before he understood her logic, and he had to admit he had chosen his words poorly. He grabbed her wrists and brought her back in front of him, but she writhed and tried to break his grip. He spun her around and pulled her hips against his pulsing cock.
“Don’t believe what my mother said. Not for a minute. I’ve already told you several times that I took myself in my hand, Maude.” He murmured in her ear from behind her. “I pictured you as I pumped my cock until my eyes crossed. I imagined taking you from behind just like you offered, but what I pictured wasn’t gentle lovemaking. I imagined making you moan my name until you screamed. Every time I thought of you, my damn cock ended up hard as a bluidy rock. Even dunks in the frigid loch didn’t ease my need while I was away. I would slip down to the loch at night, hoping to cool my ardor that went unspent all day while I missed you. I fisted myself night after night. I showed you last eve that I stood at that window imagining I might see you all the way in Stirling. When I returned to court, it was no different. When I couldn’t face the icy water, I called for a bath. Those times I didn’t have to rush. I pictured taking you in every position and place I can conceive of. I never went whoring, Maude, nor did I visit anyone from my past. I need you, and only you will satisfy me. So, wife, don’t for a moment doubt that I will be faithful to you. If this is what you want, then I shall gladly show you every fantasy I’ve ever had of you.”
When her hips danced against his rather than pulling away, he slammed his cock into her sheath. He maneuvered them so she braced herself against the mattress. Maude realized this time was different. Even when Kieran seemed to lose control in the past, there was still a tenderness in the way they came together. This time, Maude let her body dictate her desires rather than her heart. She was sure Kieran noticed the shift because he growled and increased his pace. His arm snaked around her waist, and his fingers dug into the meaty flesh of her breast, the sensation verging on pain.
“Get on the bed,” he demanded, and Maude scrambled onto the mattress, kneeling with her weight on her forearms and her backside in the air. Her moan was pure ecstasy as he thrust into her again and again. Kieran met each of her moans with an answering grunt. He couldn’t get enough. The faster and harder he thrust, the stronger the sense grew. He realized it would never be enough. He had claimed his wife’s maidenhead, he had brought her pleasure more than once, and he felt more connected to her than he had anyone else in his life, but until there was a way that they could fuse into one being, it would never be enough.
“I don’t understand what you’re doing to me,” Maude whispered. “Why do I still want more? I’m so close, but it’s like I want to crawl inside you. What are you doing to me?”
Hearing Maude voice the words he thought consumed him. He climbed onto the bed and pressed her into the mattress. His body covered hers as his hand slipped beneath her. He found her nub and rubbed until she shattered, screaming an incoherent sound. He followed her over the edge as he gave one last thrust. And then reality came clattering back down around Kieran’s ears. He jumped away like a scalded cat and backed up until he met the far wall. He looked at his wife’s spent body as she labored to breathe. He had a view that only moments ago would have had him thrusting into her glistening sheath but now made him feel revolted at his selfishness.
She asked what I was doing. I was fucking my wife harder than I would any whore. What have I done?
Maude shivered as the air turned cold around her, and she couldn’t feel Kieran anywhere near her. She rolled over and sat up, and the sight that greeted her made her heart turn just as cold as her body. Kieran’s face was the picture of disgust and loathing, but he wasn’t looking at her, or rather, he refused to look at her. Maude looked around the chamber, a sickening dread taking root. She spotted her kirtle and slid from the bed. She grabbed it and said a prayer of thanks that it was one she could get into on her own. She glanced back at her husband and noticed he was watching her with a stricken gaze. It was as though he was hurt by her instead of the other way around. Maude paused and puzzlement showed on her face before she brushed her hands over her skirts. There was something else happening, but she didn’t understand her husband’s sudden shift in mood.
“I’m sorry,” his hoarse whisper barely reached her. “I’m sorry I scared you, and I’m sorry I mistreated you.”
“Mistreated me? Scared me?” Maude dropped the gown and inched toward Kieran as though he were an injured and unpredictable wild animal.
“Yes. Just now. The way, I--”
“Made love to me?”
“That wasn’t making love,” Kieran shuddered.
“I thought it was.”
“That’s because you don’t know any better.” Kieran watched Maude bristle and reach for her gown once more. His next words were barely audible. “I meant I fucked you. I fucked my own wife.”
Just as she had a moment ago, Maude stood and moved toward him. “You’re right; I don’t know. And you’re not making any sense to me, but you are scaring me now.” When she stood before him, she witnessed a hollowness in his eyes that she’d never seen before. “Kieran?”
“That isnaehow a mon is meant to treat his lady wife. I shouldnae have been so rough with you. I wouldnae even treat--” Kieran snapped his mouth shut before he made it even worse.
“You wouldn’t treat a whore like that.” Maude supplied for him, and her heart broke when he nodded. The shame in his eyes made her shake her head. “Did aught I said or did make you think I wanted you to stop? I thought I made it clear I wanted it just the way it was.”
“You’ll feel differently later in the morning when you’re in pain because I didn’t care for you properly.”
