“Hey.”Nora set her paperwork down on the desk.“Are you good?”
Blinking, I realized I was glaring into space.I ran my palm down my face.“Yeah, just tired.”
“You sure?Because if you’re sick I can see if Brooks can come in.There’s a nasty bug going around, and I’m already playing chicken with it by throwing a party tomorrow.”
I only had the energy for a crooked smile.“Not sick, promise.”
“Good.”She gave one decisive nod as if everything was resolved.“You’re still planning on being there, right?Elijah’s annoying friend Seb will be there, and I fully intend to use you as a buffer between him and me.”
“Seb is a good guy.”
She only lifted an irritated eyebrow.“Olivia will be there with Anton too, and ...Anyway, it’d be great if you were there.”
She didn’t need to elaborate.During our fundraiser in October, Brooks had taken his clothes off—not all of them, just his shirt—in front of the whole town.All because Olivia, Nora’s twin sister, had flirted with him during the bachelor auction.And now, the town ran wild with speculations, even after she’d gotten engaged to Anton in December.It was a bit of a wild night, and Brooks could have just been feeding into the fun of it ...or, and more probable, he had been motivated by something different.
Not that he was talking to me about it.I’d tried back when the engagement had happened, but he’d just grunted and walked away.
He could be very perceptive about other peoples’ lives; less so about his own.
“I’ll be there,” I promised.
“Good.”Nora considered her blood-red polished nails.“You really don’t mind that Alicia will be there too?”
I snorted.“Nora, she’s my neighbor.What difference does it make if she’s at the party?”
I sounded confident and unaffected.Internally, just the mention of her name made my heartrate spike.She was an ache I couldn’t relieve.I was desperate for any sign of her.Her clove smell had faded from my pillows, but from time-to-time I heard the whisper of her music through our wall or saw her red hair under a white stocking cap as she took Furgie for a walk.
She was everywhere, and it still wasn’t enough.
No matter how I looked at the situation, I couldn’t find a clear way forward.It was probably best that I didn’t tell her how she haunted me, that I couldn’t imagine just letting her leave and never being with her.Wasn’t that the right thing to do?To not hurt her, again.
Every time I found resolve to keep my feelings to myself, I’d see her or think of her and my chest would feel too small to hold all the affection I had for her.There were three voices yelling in my head simultaneously.
I love her.
Let her live her life.
But the worst one was the quietest,What if she still loves me too?
Add on the obscene amount of jerking-off it took just to get through my day ...
So, I had no idea what to do.
Nora narrowed her eyes at me.“If you change your mind and you need to bail tomorrow, it’s cool.”
“I’ll be fine.”
Just fucking fine.
My body knew Alicia was home before my brain did.The rush of adrenaline in my veins, and the tightening of my abdominals all in preparation of seeing her.I turned into my driveway, and she came into view walking up to her front door with Furgie on the leash lazily sniffing the mounds of snow, a little white clump stuck to the top of her nose.And walking by Alicia’s side in a Carhartt coat was Emmett.
I didn’t want to hate it, but I did.
The handle to my side door was cold against my fingers when Alicia called my name from the front porch.I gave myself a second to press my forehead against the thin wooden door and close my eyes.I was so close to avoiding the blooming relationship between the woman I breathed for and another man.While simultaneously, relief washed over me to hear my name from her lips—to have an excuse to talk to her.My brain was in a prison of my emotions.
With a deep breath, I straightened and moved around the corner of the building with a wave.I jerked my chin up in greeting to Emmett before letting my eyes fall on Alicia.She had a scarf wrapped around her neck and her bulky coat hid every single one of her curves, but my heart still skipped a beat and all the blood rushed out of my brain.I shoved my hands in the pockets of my scrubs hoping to disguise the semi I was suddenly sporting.
“Hey, what’s up?”I asked.
