There’s the relief I’ve been looking for.
Startling awake, perspiration clings to me from head to toe as I desperately try to take a deep breath. My vision is blurry, but the same fear and panic I felt moments ago, in my father’s presence no longer thickens the air like it had.
Something brushes against my cheek, forcing me even further into the present as I notice the outline of someone hovering above me. I frown, unable to see clearly as I let the tendrils of my nightmare wash away.
The touch is gone as I wipe a hand down my face and blindly shuffle backward to press my back against the headboard of my bed when the slightest creak of a door whispers in the air, making me freeze.
With adrenaline coursing through my veins, my vision grows clearer, and as quickly as I rememberwhere I am, I’m on my feet. Groggily, I scurry to the door and swing it open, ready to catch whoever was just in here, but to my dismay, all I find is an empty hallway.
Gasping for breath, I try to settle, despite my pulse pounding in my ears.
A bad dream.
An observer.
A fucking mess.
I consider trying to open the door across the hall, but all that would do is cause more issues with its residents. The less I have to deal with them, the better.
Closing the door, I shuffle back to my bed and snatch my cell phone up off the nightstand, but there’s not even a notification on the CCTV app.
Maybe I’m just going insane. It fits the story of my life right now.
With a defeated sigh, I dive back under the covers and stare up at the ceiling.
“Is everything okay?” Ocean whispers.
My gaze darts to her sleepy form, but she doesn’t even open her eyes.
Despite the frenzy building inside of me, I hum. “Yeah, but we need a lock for that door,” I mutter, and her lips curl into a soft smile as she nods, ruffling her hair along the pillow.
“I’ll make it happen.”
I whisper my thanks as she swiftly drifts back to sleep, but there’s no chance for me. I’ll sleep when I’m dead, but even then, I’m sure the devil will have me dancing as his well-poised puppet.
FIVE
ELODIE
Icrank the water hotter as I stand in the shower, letting the spray pour down on me once again. I relish in the burn. Hopefully, this time it will help ease some of the stress that rests on my shoulders.
The remnants of my nightmare still linger, even though I’ve been awake for hours. The weight of it feels raw and honest, like it just happened, but it was years ago. It’s a reminder that my trauma isn’t going anywhere. But more than that, it’s a reminder of what I’ve already survived. Instead of letting it tear me down, I need to allow it to build me up.
Sucking in a deep breath, I try to accept it and push it to the back of my mind. The moment I do, the mess that was yesterday rears its ugly head.
My body aches, a fact Ocean said could be due to the potion, combined with the rage I exerted ateveryone who stood in the way of my freedom. I’m going to be feeling it for the next few days at least.
I poisoned myself, made a run for it, and wound up back here anyway.
Walker.
My chin dips to my chest as my heart rate increases. I’ve never been more disappointed in my life, and that’s saying something considering the experiences I’ve had.
He was my figure of hope, my light in the darkness, until his truth came out and his life in the shadows was revealed. He was never my friend, my safety net, my ride or die; he was my goddamn babysitter. For who? I don’t know. The Sanctum? Maybe, but he didn’t say that. He didn’t say much at all.
Regardless, he’s dead to me. There’s no other way around it—he’s just another arrow in my already wounded chest.
Swiping a hand down my face, I sigh and shake out my shoulders. I’m already exhausted and my day hasn’t even begun. The thought of a nap sounds enticing, but it won’t come. Even if it did, I wouldn’t be able to sleep tonight and I’d rather be groggy now than see the harsh reality of the twilight hour.
