Take care,
Jack
CHAPTER THREE
Jenna
“Holy shit. There is a lot to unpack here. You’re right to be confused. That last letter. Phew! I’m burning up.” Hayley fans her face, bouncing on the couch. We abandoned our half-eaten dinner as soon as the girls suggested reading the letters, and now we’re spread out in my living room, letters all over the floor. “He was so innocent early on. And can I say, a little bit dorky?” She cringes and I try unsuccessfully to suppress my giggle.
“That’s Jack. He still has his dorky moments.”
“I like him,” Blair adds, her cheeks a little more crimson than they were before she started reading what I’m calling Jack’s “dirty” letter. “He seems sweet. But every now and then he changes. As though the real Jack was dying to come out and reveal himself, only he wasn’t sure if he should.”
“You thinkthat’sthe real Jack? The last letter?”
“You don’t?”
“I don’t know. That’s why I called for help.”Why I’m considering some drastic measures.
Blair rubs at her forehead and we both turn to Hayley, hoping she has some great words of wisdom.
“What I love is that he actually edged you in that letter. I’m dying. What was he going to do next?”
“Right?!” That’s why it made me so goddamn wet. I don't think I realized that he knew me that well. That intimately. “It’s confusing. I’m confused.”
“I’ll bet. What are you going to write back?”
“I have no freaking idea.”
“Why didn’t you send him a Thanksgiving letter?” Blair asks, changing the topic. “If you’ve never missed a letter in eight years, why’d you miss that one? Was he right? Was it because he asked about your mom?” The concern etched into her features has me cringing. Trust her to focus on that part of the letter.
“Will you accept that I forgot?”
“Definitely not.” She laughs gently, the concern still there.
“Me either.” Hayley sides with Blair. “We may not have known you that long, but you’re no flake.”
Dammit. She’s right. I’m no flake. And I didn’t forget.
The truth is, my mom disappeared on me.Again. Just when I was getting used to having her around.
I was looking forward to another white Christmas in Vermont. Counting down the days. I’m not due to start my next project until January. The timing was perfect. She’d promised it would be the two of us this year, and it’s been years since that happened.
Sure, I’m an adult now. Old enough to have my own kids if that’s what I wanted. Only, what I want is my mom. I shouldn’t be letting her get to me so much, but every time she walks back into my life, promising me that she’s done with the shitty men in hers, I believe it. And every time, she finds another douchebag and makes him her whole world, leaving me behind.
Forgetting she has a daughter.
It’s been that way since my dad died. In the past, she claimed that she needed someone to help take care of me. Because she was always in and out of work. But I moved to LA when I was eighteen. She can’t use that excuse nine years later.
You’d think I’d be used to it by now. And I should be. Only this time, she disappeared to France, leaving her landlord my details to collect rent.
I wanted to write to Jack. But with that, and everything that happened with Blair and Zane these past few months, I wasn’t in the right headspace. The last thing he needs is me complaining about the drama with my mom during the holiday season when his parents are dead. At least I’ve got a parent in my life.
“If I tell you, you’re not allowed to feel sorry for me, or harp on about it. Our focus today is Jack and his latest letter, not what I’m about to say.”
Hayley nods, while Blair hesitates. “Um. I—”
“I never pushed you to talk about your past,” I remind her and she blows out a breath.
