I owe you that. And more.
I’d love to say I’d do it all differently if I had my time again, only that would be a lie. I loved every second of our time together. If given the chance, I’d happily spend that time over—fighting you, teasing you, fucking you in an alley…holding you while you slept.
Anything to be close to you again.
To you we only just met, but for me, it’s been building for years. I hope you understand me enough to see that I’m real. That from now on, I’ll always be real with you.
This is me.
Take care,
Mason.
Take. Care.Take care?
Jesus. Jumping up, I rush over to my closet and grab Jack’s letters, emptying the box onto the floor. Frantically opening each letter, it takes me all of five minutes to sort them into two piles—“take care” and “cheers.” The letters are different. The tone is different.
My stomach knots.
Mason wrote ten letters. Ten! Including the last one. The letter that had me packing my bags and flying to meet him.
Jack. I went to meet Jack. Only it wasn’t him.
Down to my very core, with every inch of my being, it felt like Mason knew me. Because he does. He’s known me for years. And if he hadn’t written that final letter, I never would have known him in return.
Tears prick my eyes and I throw the box across the room, my heart galloping in my chest. What do I say to that? How do I—
“Jenna.” Mason clears his throat, and I frantically wipe my eyes, my gaze lifting to his. “I know you wanted me to stay put, but I heard a crash. Are you okay?”
“No.” I shake my head, my voice catching. “I’m not even close to okay and I hate you for it.”
“Jenna, I’m—”
I wave my hand, cutting him off, needing to get this off my chest. “I don’t cry, Mason. Ever. Only you already know that.” His gaze softens as he leans a shoulder against the doorframe, his piercing blue eyes holding me hostage until I blink. “Andsince you know me so well, I don’t need to explain that Ineverdo relationships. I don’t do love. Not the all-consuming, can’t-breathe-without-you love, not the love of your life, soulmate fairytale bullshit. Not even the boy meets girl, cutesy crush kind of stuff. I don’t do it.”
Mason nods but otherwise remains stoic, allowing me to continue, once again showing me that he gets it.
“You made me question things, Mason. You made me feel things I’ve never felt. In four goddamn days. Four days. Then you ripped my heart clear out of my chest. I don’t do love because I don’t want to feel like this. I don’t want to be like my mom, chasing happiness from one guy to the next, always thinking the current one's her soulmate. Spoiler alert—he’s not. He never is. And you made me forget that for a moment. Until it all came crashing back on me.”
“I should have told you the second I saw you, but I was pissed off. We’d… I’d been sending you letters for years,and you read one that’s…let’s face it, borderline pornographic, and you pack a bag to pay Jack a visit. Here I was falling for you and you fly thousands of miles for sex.”
“You think that’s what that was?”
“Wasn’t it?” Mason’s expression turns cold, while his eyes give away his hurt, along with the softness of his voice. “Why else would you wait until that letter? It’s been years and you never once mentioned the idea of visiting Australia.”
My heart jolts because he’s right. I went because that letter felt like a hand reaching from the page and shoving me out the door. Like Jack was pushing me to go. Taunting me. Except it wasn’t Jack at all. “Why’d you write it?”
“What?” He blinks as though my question confuses him.
“Why did you write it? What did you think would happen?” I hold his stare, needing to see every emotion as it flits across his face.
It seems like a million thoughts travel through his head before he settles on one, determination set in his gaze. “I think I wanted you to come.”
“You think? But you still got mad at me.”
“Because you did!” he yells exasperatedly, stalking toward me from across the room. “Iwrote that letter.Iwanted to do those things to you. Butyouwere there for Jack. The guy that doesn’t pay attention. The guy that asked his big brother to write to the girl he now claims to love.”
“Why’d you do it in the first place?”
