His entire body freezes at the question, but within a moment, he’s back to working the kitchen. “I guess, sometimes. Maybe. But mostly just… feeling like I’m going to fuck Leo up.”
“Evan, you could never fuck Leo up.”
We drift into silence, and I drag my bottom lip into my mouth, sucking on it. I’m wrestling with my inner thoughts, unsure if I’d be overstepping a boundary by asking what I want to. But I want to understand why Evan and Leo’s lives are the way they are. I’m interested, not because I’m being nosy, but because I care.
“You don’t have to tell me, and if you do, I promise I’m not going to run and tell anyone, but… what happened to Leo’s mom? Why isn’t she in his life anymore?”
This isn’t something Evan publicly explains, and I’m probably an idiot for asking and thinking that he would treat me any differently. He doesn’t trust me enough not to run off and sell the story to some sleazy magazine, and I don’t blame him for the silence I receive.
However, to my surprise, he eventually speaks.
“She left out of the blue. Both of us. We haven’t heard from her since.”
My mouth pops open, and I stare at him, dumbfounded. The public has always speculated what happenedbetween him and his son’s mother, but hearing him confirm that she no longer wanted to be in the picture makes me sad for the kid. For both of them. Who would leave their son and disappear off the face of the Earth as if it never happened? How can someone be that cruel? To leave a parent to raise their kid alone?
“Women can be shitty. I’m sorry, Evan. She had a responsibility as a parent to care for Leo, and treated him and you like you were options. It’s wrong and not fair.”
There’s another brief pause.
“You’re not going to ask for her name? What she looks like? Where she is now? That’s all you wanted to know?” He seems genuinely surprised.
I shake my head, reaching down to scratch at my still rashy legs. Evan doesn’t fail to notice it, his eyes following my movement. “You shared what you felt comfortable with, and I don’t need to know who she is. All I know is she’s missing out on the world’s greatest kid.” I shoot him a look, a small smile curling my lip. “You, though, maybe she had her reasons.”
He gives a low laugh. I like the sound. “Our relationship was… far from strong. I don’t miss it. In fact, she probably did me a service. It’s just Leo I feel sad for because he’ll have to grow up wondering what was wrong with him and why she didn’t want to stay for him.”
Evan doesn’t make eye contact with me as he speaks, and I’m shocked he’s being this open with me. He’s always careful with what he says around people, like he’srationing himself. But lately, he’s been laughing more. Smiling more. And it looks good on him.
“I don’t regret it. Not for a second. Becoming a father is the single best thing to ever happen to me, but it isn’t easy, especially when you’re doing it alone.”
“He doesn’t need a Mom like her.”
“Yeah, but it’s easier to tell yourself that when he doesn't have the option.”
Evan’s right. I’ve always been close with my family. My mother and I get on like a house on fire, and despite them divorcing when I was eighteen, I’ve never really had any issues with my parents.
“Have you explained things to him? Told him why he doesn’t have a mom?”
Plating up my eggs and toast, Evan passes it to me, and I immediately take a forkful. “To a certain degree, yes. He knows it’s just him and me, but he won’t understand why until he’s older. I’ll give him her name if he wants it, but I know he’ll look her up and probably won’t like what he sees. She seems happy, I guess. Married now. And that’ll hurt him.”
Dipping my chin to my chest, I meet Evan’s gaze, and he studies me, as if he’s running through something in his head.
“So, she’s the last woman you were with?” Perhaps my low blood sugar has made me delirious, because why am I asking Evan about the last person he fucked?
“You want to know about your boss’s sex life?”
“No shame here.”
Evan’s shoulders shake as he chuckles. “Fine, no, I’ve slept with one woman since Leo was born. It was right in the beginning after my relationship ended, but it felt forced, like I thought it was what I was supposed to do since I was single and alone.”
I hum. Evan could get any woman he wants. He’s a walking, talking God, so it’s shocking that he doesn't utilise that. “Interesting.”
He turns to look at me. “What? You’re not going to tell me about yours?”
“You want to know aboutmysex life?”
“Only fair.”
I laugh. “Sure, it’s been a good six months. I guess we’re both out of practice.”
