“I don’t doubt that.” The man’s smiling at me, but then he nods towards the door. “I think I’m done here. Is that okay?”
Disappointment and relief swarm me simultaneously. “Are you sure? I swear you won’t regret getting to know him.”
The man chuckles, face warm and bright. “It seems he’s already made his choice. I can’t compete with that. I’ll see myself out, thanks, Mae.”
I blink as he exits the room, running my hands through my hair before I kneel on the floor and wrap my arms around the proud dog before me.
“Happy with yourself?”
His response is a nuzzle, making me laugh.
I sigh. “You’re just like me, buddy.” A sad smile stretches my lips. “We haven’t quite worked out where we belong.”
“So let me get this straight. My fatherthreatened you with photos of you and Nathan? What a piece of shit!” Poppy gags. “And now you and Nathan are…?”
“Nothing,” I say, my breathing slightly shaky. “We’re nothing.”
“Because you’re leaving?”
My shoulders rise in a shrug. “And because he’ll get kicked off the team.”
“So? He hates football.” Poppy focuses on her hair she’s braiding in her living room mirror. “I mean, he likes it but hates it at the same time. Likes to play it but hates the competitiveness.”
“I know, but he’s put up with his father’s abuse for years so that he can win for his mom. I can’t let that all be for nothing.”
“It’s not for nothing if he has you.”
The ground has been pulled from beneath me, and my heart has been wretched from my body. How can something that seemed so right suddenly vanish into nothing?
Memories of our time together flood my mind. Walks with Radish. Home-cooked meals. Sex in his bed where, after, I spent the night curled into his chest, watching chick flicks I know he secretly enjoyed even though he claimed he didn't. I even managed to convince him to try my favourite brand of cinnamon-flavoured ice cream, and despite his belief that he’d absolutely hate it, he actually enjoyed it. I even caught him throwing an extra tub into the shopping cart for himself when he thought I wasn’t looking.
“Mae?” Poppy whispers, and it isn’t until she sighs that I realise my eyes have welled with tears.
“I love him, Pops.” Fuck. I hate crying in front of people. This year, I told myself my New Year’s resolution was to let emotions get in the way less… so far, it’s going fucking great.
“I know.” Tears drip down her own cheeks. “It fucking kills me to see the both of you like this. My brother has never opened up to anyone like he has with you. I can see it in his eyes. He loves you too, Mae. So much. He deserves happiness. You both do. I’m so pissed off it’s being stolen from you both.”
I dab at my face, worried the tears have smudged my makeup.
“I know you don’t want me to get involved, but—”
“No, Poppy. Please, don’t. Confronting your dad won’t change his mind. It’ll make things worse for everyone.”
She clicks her teeth shut, looking frustrated. “Okay, fine, but I swear, if I see him in person, I’m gonna crack his spine.”
I wipe my face. “We’ve got to get to practise.”
“Can we just skip it?”
“My mom would have your head if she knew you’d said that.”
My friend shrugs. “She can have it. With everything going on, I don’t want it anyway.”
I drive us to the stadium. It’s Tuesday, and the guys don’t have practice today, so I won’t have to see Nathan training from a distance.
Because I can’t lie and say I don’t watch him when I leave or arrive.
Every time I do, I get flashbacks of his lips on my own, his chest flush with mine and cock stroking into me so incredibly it brings me to multiple orgasms. Just the thought arouses me, and knowing no one will ever compare to him sets me up for a life full of crappy, meaningless sex.
