Inconsiderate.
Immature.
Grow up.
“Can you block his number?” Jake asks, and bile rises in my throat.
I draw a shaky breath, my hands starting to tremble. “It’ll be worse if I do that.”
Bri knows I’m a professional worrier, and that I often doubt myself. It’s like she can read my mind right now. “You did the right thing leaving. Don’t let him convince you otherwise.”
I feel stupid, embarrassed. Everyone around me knew Rob was a piece of shit, but they let me go on like he wasn’t. They didn’t even know the full scope of it. I hid a lot of his more cutting critiques behind smiles and good-natured laughs, when really I was breaking inside.
And now, I’m left feeling broken.
“Why didn’t you say something?” I ask, tears brimming. “You knew he was bad and you let me get engaged to him.”
Bri shakes her head, her round Cindy Lou Who eyes going watery. “You weren’t ready to hear it. The best I could do was support you in whatever decision you made.”
I know what she’s saying is true, and that my stubbornness wouldn’t have let me walk away. I’d have rebelled if people told me to ditch him.
And the thing I didn’t realize is that having a bad partner affected my friendships too. There were so many things I never told Bri, ways I pulled away.
“He didn’t like it when I talked to you. He didn’t like how close we are, so he drove me away from you,” I whisper. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have let him.”
Bri leans out of Becca’s lap to hug me tight. “We’re good, honey. We’re always good. But now we need to getyouback to good.”
I fight bigger tears. This is probably a discussion we should have at the end of the night, or over coffee tomorrow morning. We’re headed out to party at a bar, and I’m having an emotional reckoning with my best friend.
But it’s not just her supporting me. Jake’s hand lightly pats my knee, and Becca snuggles my arm. “Sorry, boss,” she whispers.
Bri and I pull apart, and I hold my fingers under my lashes to sop up any spilling makeup.
“Is it him you’re running from?” Becca asks, and it’s the most serious I’ve ever heard her.
I nod. “We were getting married in September. But he messed with stuff at my job and that was the last straw.”
“Ew! Fuck him!” Becca cries, and it brings a little levity back into the air. We’re at a red light and Jake leans to kiss my temple. I’m sure this is awkward for him, talking about my shithead ex while we’re just getting our feelings for each other sorted out. But he’s trying, and that means so much.
“You girls need anything to eat?” Jake offers. “Last call before we’re there.”
I laugh and get out my lip gloss. “Always feeding me.”
“Well, I’m not going to let you go to a bar hungry and then get all trashed and sad,” he harrumphs.
“You’re so mad about it,” I tease. What he doesn’t know is there’s no way I’m getting drunk tonight. Rob’s continued attempts to contact me, my spiral yesterday when I was sick, and having an emotional moment with Bri are enough to send my anxiety off the chain. Booze is not going to help.
“I’ll make sure she has fun, Dad,” Bri says and his jaw flexes. Bri giggles as she slides off Becca’s lap and onto the gravel parking lot. “You’re right. It is easy to push his buttons.”
Jake pulls us right up to the door of the bar. “You girls be good,” he says, winking at me when I whip around to chastise him about it. Before I get out, his warm hand returns to my knee. “For real. Have fun. You deserve it. You’ll be alright?”
“I will. You’ll be back soon?”
“Yeah. Probably just an hour or so once I get there,” he says.
“‘Kay.” I bite my bottom lip and he tracks the movement.
Jake lowers his voice to a husky rumble. “Don’t forget about me in there, alright?”
