Jake’s eyes narrow. “Please don’t talk down to me. You know there are reasons for that.”
“I’m sorry.” I hold my hands out. “That wasn’t meant to be a dig. I’ve just lived a very different life than you have and I think there are things you’re overlooking.”
That didn’t help. His anger might have doubled. “Darcy, your path isn’t the only path. This sounds an awful lot like it’s about you and not about me.”
“It’s not,” I object. “You’re brilliant, Jake. You deserve to use this education. If you choose me, you’re leaving all of this behind. It’s okay if I’m just the girl you leave behind.” I sniffle, trying to keep my tears in.
“Is this about Sierra?” Jake shakes his head and looks at the floor between us. “Just because I left her doesn’t mean I’m leaving you.”
“Why would you stay? You have this degree.”
“Almost,” he says, trying to make a small joke. “Don’t count your chickens before they hatch.”
I level him with a look. “You know what I mean.”
“Sorry. I don’t like fighting with you. Trying to keep it light.” He sniffs in a breath and crosses his arms. “Look, I’ve been exploring other options.”
“Jake,” I plead.
His expression goes fully serious and he nods, eyes falling to the floor between us. “If you really don’t want to be with me, I’m not going to force you.”
“I do want to be with you,” I argue.
“Then be with me! See where this goes!”
My lower lip wobbles and I fight it. This is where the rubber meets the road, the sticking point. “I need to know you’re fully choosing me, Jake. That you’re not just choosing me to avoid making another choice.”
He scrunches up his face. “What?”
“I don’t want you to be here because you’re afraid to go home. I don’t want you to be here because you’re settling. I don’t want you to give up your best years because you went for comfortable rather than taking a chance.”
“My best years? Darcy, they’d be my best years because I’m with you. Why can’t you accept thatyouare what makes life sweet? You, loving you, growing and changing with you, being with your family,makinga family—that’s what’s so sweet. Not some Hollywood fantasy where I have some high-powered job, and then I have my Hallmark movie moment where I come home and learn the true meaning of life from some hunky guy on my family farm.”
My jaw sets and I’m half tempted to slap him. “Don’t make fun of me, Jake Warren. You’re mocking my entire life right now. If I’d known this was how you felt all this time?—”
“That all I was to you was an escape from real life? And now you’re telling me not to make the same stupid mistake you did? I was your mistake, Darcy. In that scenario,I’mthe mistake.”
“You’re not a mistake,” I whisper. “But you just called my life foolish.”
He sits half his ass on the table, steepling his fingers to cradle his forehead. “I’m not trying to hurt you, Darcy?—”
“Too late,” I snap.
“You’re hurting me! You know what I’ve been doing? Trying to figure out how to stick around, how to teach longer, how to patent my robot so I can sell it to a company.”
“I don’t want you making plans around me!” I finally start to cry. “I need you to be sure, Jake. Because I won’t be able to live with myself if I know that years down the road, you’re going to regret me.”
Jake draws a deep breath, rubbing his lips between his teeth. “Just because you regret decisions you’ve made doesn’t mean I regret mine.”
I pinch my nose. “You said you didn’t want farm life. If you choose me, you’re probably getting farm life.”
“I said that before I had you. Before we happened.”
“You can’t build your life around love alone, Jake!”
Jake shakes his head, and I’ve never seen him so sad. “What else is the point of life, Darcy? Why shouldn’t love be the center of everything?”
A single tear streaks down my cheek. “Because sometimes love isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.”
