“It was good to see Dev,” Nick said as they walked away. I gave him dagger eyes. He lowered his voice. “What? You can’t just stop talking till they walk away. It’s way too obvious.”
“What did ‘both of you’ mean?” I hissed.
“Don’t read too much into it. It’s probably fine.”
“Yeah, right. He’s been gunning for me since I got you in exchange for Guy.”
“I’m sure it’s fine,” Nick said. My leg bounced under the table on my barstool. Nick looked me in the eye as he placed a gentle hand on my thigh to stop it. “It’s going to be okay, Annie.”
We finished dinner, left a tip, and headed out. Nick put a soft hand on my lower back to usher me out the door but quicklypulled it away. “Sorry,” he mumbled as he waved over his head to Dev and Priya.
Nick walked me to the passenger door of his truck, but before he opened it, he put my back against it. I looked around, making sure we were fully alone and out of view of the restaurant.
He stroked his thumb along my cheekbone. “Hey. I’m sorry about that. I’m sure it’ll be fine, but know that if it’s not, I’ve got you, okay?”
“What do you mean, you’ve got me? This is my career, Nick. It’s how I make money. Feed myself. You’re just in an exclusive fucking-around relationship with me. That has nothing to do with how I eat and pay my bills.” I shifted, not meeting his eyes. “I wanna go home.”
He folded his lips between his teeth. “If you really want to go home, I’ll take you. But it’s not just fucking around for me, Annie. I care about you.”
“We can’t have feelings, Nick. This can’t be.”
“What about friend feelings?”
I looked up to find his eyes earnest. “Friend feelings with physical stuff? You can handle that?”
“I’m a big boy. I can handle it.” He leaned to kiss under my ear, making me squirm. “But I’m feeling pretty needy physically.”
I huffed a laugh. “You might make me a little needy too.”
Chapter 27
Nick
NOVEMBER | Tarot: Nine of Pentacles
I hadn’t thought everything through.
I wanted Annie to come into a romantic setting at my house for our first lesson. I wanted it to be special for her, just like it was for me. I rushed around, trying to do a bunch of things as soon as we got in the door. Annie watched as I dug through a kitchen drawer in search of a lighter.
“Um, I need to take Greg out before we . . . yeah.”
“Are you nervous, Nick?”
“What? No. I just want everything to be nice.”
Her smile was gentle. “What’s nice to you?”
“Um, candles and music and soft lighting and like, flowers and stuff.”
She crossed the room and took my hand. “How about we walk Greg together?”
“Oh, you don’t have to—” I started, but she leveled me with a look.
“Greg misses his mommy, right? Let’s go take him out. He’ll like having both of us.” She pushed up on her tiptoes and kissed my cheek, then shut the drawer I’d been digging through. “Come on.”
The night was cool when we stepped outside, Greg indeed thrilled with the group walk. My breaths were ragged, my insides all coiled up. I kept clenching and unclenching my fist, wanting to touch Annie, but somehow second-guessing myself now that we were getting ready to officially start our arrangement. I’d had her nipples in my mouth earlier that day. Whispered filthy words in her ear until she came in my lap. It had been so easy to kiss her before we went to dinner, but that was at her place. We were on my turf and it all seemed so real. This was what I’d pictured for so long, since we made our agreement in my bed when I was sick. Why was I such a mess?
Annie had no such trepidation, sliding her fingertips down my forearm and lacing her fingers with mine. She leaned her head into my shoulder as we walked.
