She grumbled something that sounded like “not all men.” I went back to her prior point.
“I felt like I stuck up for you, Jessie,” I argued. “What more did you want?”
“She was the second woman and third person this evening to look at me like I was trash, okay? Maybe that wore me down a bit.”
“Jess, she was jealous of you. Take it as a compliment.”
“She was jealous because I fake have something she wants! I don’t even know why I’m worked up about this. What we’re doing isn’t even real. Soon enough, you’ll be right back to women like her so things won’t be ‘stale’ for you anymore,” Jessie ranted, plopping down on her side of the bed.
God, I could never imagine things being stale with Jessie, but Iknewit was the wrong time to say that. “Honey—”
“I don’t even have a real boyfriend, but Cole is dating someone else. He just thinks I am.”
She wasn’t facing me, but her shoulders shook as her tears came. I moved to sit next to her and put my arm around her.
“Let it out, babe.”
Jessie wailed, leaning into my chest. “Four fucking years,” she spat, her teeth chattering with how hard she was crying, “and who knows how long he’s been cheating.”
I cradled her head as she cried, feeling awful that Cole had put her through so much pain, and that I didn’t lighten the load that night like I’d intended.
I could have asked her to be my real girlfriend right then. But I didn’t want her to date me out of desperation. I was the desperate one. I didn’t want to be her rebound. I wanted to be the one she wanted. The knife twisted in me, too.
Her crying slowed.
“You’ve gotta get up early, Sweet Cheeks. You wanna try to get some sleep?”
She nodded, and I pulled back the sheets for her, tucking her in. I wanted to do anything I could to make her feel cared for, to make her life a little easier. I draped Yarn Wad across her neck.
She looked at me, mystified. “Thanks.”
“Will you let me drive you tomorrow?”
“Why?” she asked.
“I want you to have fun on your way to work. Just the two of us. Otherwise, Mom and Lori’ll be here, and there’s a game, and then I’ll be going on the road. Can we have Jessie and Ben friend time tomorrow morning?”
Her breath shuddered as she dabbed her face with a tissue. “That’d be really nice.”
“Okay. Do you need reading time?”
“No, I’m exhausted,” she said with a sniff. I opened my arms just expecting a hug, but she tangled her legs with mine, burrowed her face in my chest, and fell asleep within a couple of minutes.
I didn’t object.
Chapter 23
Jessie
It turned out that being Ben’s fake girlfriend wasn’t as hard as I imagined it might be. Thursday morning, he drove me to work. We sang and laughed, drinking coffee. He really was doing everything he could to cheer me up about the Cole situation. For brief periods, I’d forget how much I was betrayed. It was nice.
Thursday night, Mikey had a game and I was in bed when he got home. I briefly woke up as he thumped into bed, groaning so loud it could shake the earth. Sweet as he can be, he’s still the loudest man in the world.
“Tired?” I asked, rolling over to look at him.
“Wiped,” he moaned, then wiggled his eyebrows. “Can I score a snuggle, girlfriend?”
I laughed, worming my way over to him. I supposed we were just accepting that physical part of our relationship. Friendship. Whatever it was. “Sure.” But when I got close, I got a whiff of him. “Ugh, you smell like a bar.”
