Elizabeth dragged herself up the stairs. The breakfast had continued merrily on for another two hours after Mr. Darcy’s early departure, but now the last guests were gone, as was the newly married couple.
He had removed so abruptly! They had at last been on the precipice of a normal conversation. She had even teased him a bit, and he had not appeared to dislike it. But he had left—hadplannedto leave—directly from Longbourn, and after only a short appearance. She wondered if there was something at home that required his immediate presence or if he just had not wanted to remain here.
She feared she knew the answer.
Slowly, Elizabeth opened the door to her chamber and stepped inside, wanting nothing more than to bury herself beneath her warm quilt and sleep for a time.
“Lizzy,” Kitty said brightly, from where she and Mary were perched on the bed. “It is strange, is it not? Jane not being here,that is. She had been gone before on visits, but her room is empty now. And Lydia’s too.”
“I am not ashamed to say that I like Longbourn better without Lydia,” Mary said primly. “She was so very loud and always seemed to take up all the space in a room.”
“I cannot say you are wrong,” Kitty interjected, “but I miss her all the same.”
“It is the way of things,” Elizabeth said gently. “One day, both of you will leave Longbourn for your own homes as well.”
Mary shook her head, but Kitty smiled.
“What of you, Lizzy?” Mary asked. “Do not you wish for a home of your own?”
“I do,” Elizabeth replied. “But it must be with the right man.”And the right man for me has already come and gone.She closed her eyes against the throbbing in her head.
“I brought you some of Hill’s headache powders,” Mary told her. “You should take them.”
Elizabeth ought to have known that Mary would notice, for her sister could be quite observant when she wished. Mary held out a glass of water, and Elizabeth stirred the medicine in and drank it. “Thank you, Mary.”
“I am sorry you were so afflicted today of all days, but I suppose the idea of separating from Jane could not have been a happy one. At least she is only at Netherfield House.” Mary took the glass and set it on the table.
“True,” Elizabeth replied. “True.”
“What are you saying?” Kitty was aghast. “It is five miles away. Meryton is only one, but you still have to turn around and come back again!”
“It is only three, the way I walk,” Elizabeth said, waggling her eyebrows. Her sisters laughed.
“Still, it is not the same.” Kitty’s expression was drawn, mournful. “Longbourn feels so empty. And it will be worse whenyou go to Netherfield, Lizzy, for I know that once you are there, Jane will not want to send you home again.” She glanced at her other sister. “I mean no insult to you, Mary. It is only—there were five of us, and soon there will be only two.” She shook her head. “I used to think I should like to have grand adventures, but I find I am not half so brave without Lydia.”
“Changes like this are hard for everyone,” Mary assured Kitty. Elizabeth almost smiled, but she did not wish to offend Mary. Change was not difficult for Mary. She longed for peace as much as Papa, and if losing a few sisters to matrimony gained her more time for quiet reflection, no doubt it would be deemed a reasonable sacrifice.
“Think on this, Kitty,” Elizabeth said. “When you are a little older, Jane will likely take you to town during the season. You will have your sisters about you, those whowishto travel to London, at any rate.” She gave Mary a wink and was delighted when her pious sister actually rolled her eyes. “You will have both diversion and familiarity. You could not have expected as much had Jane not married Mr. Bingley.”
“That is true,” Kitty said. “Not this season, I suppose. That must be for Jane. But next year, perhaps?”
“I will tell Jane that you would like it, and that I am sure your manners will be everything pleasing,” Elizabeth assured her. Then she issued a warning. “You must demonstrate the truth of that so as not to call my judgment into question.”
“I will,” Kitty said, perking up. “I promise.”
“I should be pleased to go to town for music and books,” Mary said. “Perhaps Aunt and Uncle Gardiner might be willing to have me for a visit when Kitty goes.”
“I suspect you might have a visit earlier than that,” Elizabeth informed her.
“But I must save more money first. I plan to purchase as many books and as much sheet music as I can afford.”
“Very well,” Elizabeth said, making a note to save a little extra for Mary.
“Lizzy,” Kitty said shyly.
“Yes?”
“Do you think we could all sleep here tonight?”
