The rabbit stretches up and brushes his nose against Lucy’s.
She nuzzles him back, sweeping the tip of her nose side to side in a show of affection.
Lucky bastard.
“See what I mean?” the proprietor says. “If you ask me, rabbits should be man’s best friend.”
“I think you might be onto something.” Lucy glances up at me. “Do you want to hold him before we go?”
Fuck no.
Just the thought of it has my palms growing damp.
“I’m good.”
“Oh, come on.” She holds Nibbles out to me. “It’ll make a great picture, and you can’t come all the way to the rabbit ranch and not hold a single rabbit.”
“Really, it’s—”
She presses Nibbles into my hands, refusing to take no for an answer.
The little chonker weighs every bit of fifteen pounds, and I feel every one of them as I hold him at arm’s length.
“You’re scaring him,” Lucy says, gently stroking the top of his head.
“I’m scaring him?” Does she not see the terror in my eyes right now? Nibbles isn’t the only one sweating bullets. “What if he bites me? He looks like he’s got sharp little carrot-chomping teeth in there.”
She rolls her eyes, and the proprietor chuckles. “He’s not going to bite you.”
“Okay, but what if he pees on me? Or—”
“Quit being a drama queen. He’s not going to pee on you.” She pulls her phone from where it’s wedged between my palm and Nibbles’s fluffy coat. “Just let me get one quick picture of the two of you.”
“What’s with all the pictures?” I ask, narrowing my eyes. She didn’t take a single photo of me yesterday, and today it’s like she’s snapping my pic every time I so much as breathe. “If I didn’t know better, I’d think you’re taking them just to get under my skin.”
Probably so she can blackmail her way out of our deal when she loses the bet.
“Whatever gave you that idea?” She laughs and shakes her head, dismissing the suggestion as utterly ridiculous. “Now, will you just relax? I promise the rabbit isn’t going to pee on you.”
Her words are of little comfort, since she can’t actually guarantee them, but I grudgingly smile and bring the rabbit in close to my chest.
The sooner I comply, the sooner we can get this over with.
Nibbles relaxes, and I stroke the soft fur on his back as Lucy frames up the shot.
“Say rabbit ranch!”
Yeah, there’s no way I’m saying that.
Just as she taps the screen, something soft and warm hits me in the shoulder.
The proprietor’s eyes go wide, and Lucy bursts out laughing, her entire body shaking. She claps a hand over her mouth, for all the good it does.
I slowly turn my head to find a pile of bird shit—bird shit—resting on my shoulder.
You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.
“I’m sorry,” Lucy says, struggling to contain her laughter. “It’s not funny.” She shoots the proprietor a knowing grin and slides her phone into her pocket. “But it kind of is. You know, because it wasn’t Nibbles who—” She gestures to the mess on my shoulder.
