“Come! She will be here soon so you can try out the hot shower in her bathing chamber and get cleaned up for her arrival. Bas, show them the way! I need to speak to the cook about a cake. Ha!”
Sebastian
My brothers have changed. They look older, harder than they did when they left and the spark of playful cheeriness that they always seemed to carry with them is gone. In its place is a quiet, serious watchfulness that makes me nervous. I need to proceed very carefully or I could lose them when I just got them back. They made use of the showers Luca had installed when this house was built and found their outdated clothing where he had stored it in their rooms.
Cade rubs at his chest as he looks around the room and then shares a silent look with Finn that I can’t read. When he turns those aquamarine eyes my way there is no warmth in them.
“You’ve had no word of her? No sightings? The bond returned almost three days ago, now.”
I swallow down my nerves and shake my head. “No, nothing. Where have you been? I have been searching for you for decades.”
Finn sniffs. “Aye, we know. We scented you in every forest we ran through. Ya ken we dinnae want ta be found? We were trying to forget and your scent everywhere was a constant reminder.”
The anger in his eyes has me looking away as hurt fills me. My own anger has me turning back and snapping.
“Forgive me for imposing and wanting my brothers back! You weren’t the only ones who were suffering but while you were out in the world rolling around like dogs, I was here alone trying to keep Luca from fracturing into pieces. That was the second time you all left me alone to pick up the pieces while you went and grieved. Did any of you consider me when you broke up our family, our pack by leaving…again?”
Finn is the first to look away but Cade steps forward. “Aye and I’m sorry for the pain you felt at losing her as well but no one asked you ta pick up any pieces. We’re not your children, Bas that you have ta care and tend to. After hundreds of years, I like ta think we qualify as grown men able ta make our own choices. You could have left as well.”
I push to my feet and pour myself a glass of brandy and toss it back to try and cool the anger and hurt coursing through me at his easy dismissal of what we once meant to each other. When I turn back they are both facing me so I nod.
“No, you are not my children but I thought you were my brothers and my family. It is good to know where you stand on that. As for me leaving, I still consider Luca my family so I couldn’t leave him when he started to lose his mind to madness.”
They both look away but I catch the shame that crosses their expression as they do. Finn sighs.
“He has always believed she would come back but you told us she vowed not to.” He rubs his chest absently with a frown. “Why do you think she came again after promising not to?”
“I do not know. She was adamant that she wouldn’t put us through this a second time. I don’t believe she would want to hurt us this way again.” I can’t help but ask, “What…what do you feel? Can you sense anything through the bond?”
Cade curses and throws his hands up. “Who bloody knows! One minute it’s sadness and despair then panic. The next it’s happiness and orgasmic and then back to sadness, despair, and panic again. It makes no fucking sense at all.”
“We thought she was here with you because of the happiness and the…pleasure she was feeling for two days. We tried ta pick up her scent around the outskirts of the town but the rain has washed everything away. So if she’s not here with you and Luca then I’d like ta fucking know who is pleasuring our mate so we can kill him!”
I turn to reach for the brandy and squeeze my eyes shut at the news that they are so attuned to what she is feeling through the bond. The rain washing her scent from me was a lucky chance but this will not end well for any of us if I can’t think of a solution and soon. When I turn back to them my expression is a composed, blank mask.
“Luca is barely holding on to his sanity. If we find her and bring her back here…we all know how it will end at some point. Losing her again…it will finish him.”
Cade narrows his eyes at me. “What are you suggesting then? We don’t look for her? We just leave her out there somewhere all alone, unprotected? That’s our mate you’re talking about! You may be ready ta wash your hands of her but we never will!”
“No! Of course, that is not what I’m saying. I…I just don’t know what to do anymore.” I scrub at my face, suddenly so tired of it all and drop down into a chair. “She comes and we love her and then she dies and leaves us. We fracture and spend decades in misery and then she returns and we do it all over again. I love Eden and I wish things could be different but they are not. All I can see is a vicious circle in this pattern over and over again and…I am…tired. I no longer know what to do to protect all of us from this love that hurts us so very much.”
“You need to turn her or release me so I can do it. She should be with us forever. That is how you make the pain stop.” Luca says from the doorway.
I stare at him in defeat and slowly shake my head. “That is one thing I will never do. As much as this hurts, I love her too much to ever do that to her.”
Fury crosses his face and just as quickly turns into an empty smile. “Then we will ride this circle around and around and around because Eden will always come back. Just like us, she cannot live without our love.” He glances at Cade and Finn. “Supper is served. I had the cook prepare your meat as rare as possible as I am sure you are not used to having your food cooked after so many years in the wild.” And then with another empty smile, he’s gone.
Cade and Finn exchange another silent, loaded look before Cade spits out, “Fuck!”
I completely agree.
The wolves disappear from the house for long stretches over the next two days as they search for Eden’s scent. Every time they return without her Luca’s mania increases. I can’t wait any longer to get back to her. I have left her alone for almost three full days and her food and water must be gone by now. With Finn and Cade being able to detect her scent I must be very careful on how I accomplish this. I go to her room and gather some of her modern clothing that she left the last time she was here and when my fingers brush over the soft plush fabric of the bathrobe she first came to us in, I consider just ending all of this and bringing her back here. The sounds of Luca raging from deeper in the house has my resolve hardening so I pull the robe and the other clothing out and stuff it all in a sack with my own change of clothes before quickly leaving.
I keep a close watch for the wolves but do not see them as I ride into town and straight to the tavern where I left her in the room above it. I throw a stack of notes at the barkeep and order food, clean water, and a bath to be brought up and then race up the stairs to her door.
“Eden! Unlock the door!” I call out through it and lean back in surprise when I immediately hear her scratching at the door on the other side. The latch clicks but when I push the door to open it she cries out in pain. “Move back away from the door, Eden so I can come in.”
I hear movement so I ease the door slowly open and what I find has me choking in shock. She’s laying on the floor a few feet from the door reaching for me with bloody hands. Her eyes are glazed and she can barely lift her head. Her voice is a rough rasp.
