Beau is my best friend, and he’s seen me through a lot of crap, but neither one of us is good with relationship talks.
“I don’t need advice—least of all from you.”
He puts his hand over his heart and pretends to stumble back. “I’m wounded. I give great advice.”
I glance around the empty room. “Funny, you don’t ever have a woman by your side.”
“I have them in my bed, and that’s good enough for me. That’s the difference.”
“Difference? Who said I wanted a woman?”
“Jesus Christ, Zander, look at yourself in the mirror. You’re with her nonstop. I haven’t really seen you in like a week. Don’t get me wrong, I understand it. I know you’ve got to get to know each other, you’re going to be parents. But we’re still sitting on the fucking paperwork that hasn’t been discussed, let alone signed. What exactly are we doing here?”
He has his points, but the thought of involving lawyers makes my skin crawl. It just isn’t something I want to do. I don’t want it to be like that with us.
“You’re living in a fairytale. One day she’s going to be just like the rest of the women who get pregnant by someone famous. She’s going to see you on the red carpet with some pretty blonde on your arm while she’s got a crying kid in her arms, and she’s gonna be pissed and want to make problems for you.”
Beau’s cynical. I am too—that’s the reason I pushed her away in the first place. No woman can be that perfect, that kind and sweet. Especially one who was such a big fan of mine.
“All I asked was if she was going to be there.”
He quirks an eyebrow. “We’re ignoring this, okay, got the memo. I don’t know if she got the invite. That’s up to you, buddy. Man up and ask her if you want her there.”
When we stand in silence, I’m thankful to be alone with him. I walk out to the balcony, hoping the last of the sunshine will help me see the light in this situation. Beau follows me onto the balcony.
“I don’t want to put her on the spot. I feel like she already thinks it’s weird, me showing interest. I mean, I cut her off, Beau. Without explanation. There’s no coming back from that.”
He rests his forearms on the balcony. “Yeah, but things have changed since then. She wasn’t pregnant with your baby when you blew her off.”
“Still… I mean, I don’t know. Shit. I don’t have my life together. I’m not made for this. Romy’s having my baby. She’s turned from the woman I fucked into the one who’s gonna raise my kid. I can’t screw this up. If I fuck with her and things go bad, I could be screwed. I don’t want my kid to be raised in complete chaos like we were.”
“I give you shit because you pay me to. She does seem different though.” He shrugs. “She seems… I don’t know. But you definitely don’t want to make this situation more complicated than it is. As legal advice—although I’m not a lawyer—I would say keep your dick in your pants.”
“But my dick wants out.”
“Well, yeah, of course the dick wants out.”
“I really liked her back then.”
“I know,” Beau admits, his voice softer.
“You did?”
He holds a cocky smirk, staring at me from the corner of his eye. “The whole time. When you told DeSoto not to let her in, I knew you were a fool. You kept her hidden from almost everybody. You didn’t flaunt her. You didn’t make a big deal about it. You actually tried to hide out and spend time alone with her. That’s not you. You used to entertain girls then take them in the back. They were never allowed to go from city to city. You broke the rule that we didn’t leave a city with a woman in the back.”
“I know.” I knew I was breaking my one rule, but damn, Romy was different. Which was exactly what made me panic and push her away.
“But you flew her here and there—something you’ve never done for anyone before. Even though it was only three times, it seemed like your longest relationship ever—which is fucking sad, I might add.”
“Let’s see your long list of relationships.”
He chuckles and nods. “So, I always knew she was somebody important to you. That’s why I feel this whole pregnancy thing is interesting. It shakes up the playbook a little bit.”
“Oh my god, you’re not helping.” I throw my head in my hands.
“You can’t predict the future, Zan. You have to put yourself out there. I’m gonna shift from manager mode into best friend mode now. You ready?”
“Just say whatever you want to.” I blow out an annoyed breath.
