“If I had to guess? Because there’s a part of him that doesn’t think he’s good enough. That you being in his world puts you at jeopardy, and he’d sacrifice himself before he ever let anything hurt you. And if you looked at the internet right now, I’m pretty sure you would understand?—”
“What? What is it?”
She shakes her head. “It doesn’t matter. But people don’t always want the best for you. And I think, to a certain degree, you are a little naïve. I blame myself for giving you such a great childhood.” She gives me a cheeky smile.
“Mom.” I roll my eyes and give her a small smile.
“But people… even people who claim to care about Zander… they don’t always want the best for him. And that’s a hard pill to swallow. But that’s the life he knows. He’s lived it for how many years? And you haven’t. So, he’s trying to save you from that pain because he loves you.”
“So, what do you expect me to do? He’s the one who broke it off with me. Isn’t this supposed to be some talk to get my head out of my ass?”
“I don’t think you did anything wrong, Romy. I think it wasn’t working between you two, and something had to change. But I think maybe he might need a little more reassurance than most that you’re going to stick around. That you’re not going anywhere.”
“Mom, what do you want me to do? I have been—I’ve been doing everything I can.”
“I know you have, sweetie. All I’m saying… just understand a little bit from where he’s coming from on this, when he comes to talk to you.”
“Oh my god. You think he’s going to come and talk to me?” A disbelieving chuckle leaves my lips.
“Yes. He’s going to come and talk to you.”
A cold breeze blows my hair in my face, and I tuck it behind my ear. “Why would he?”
“Because he loves you. Believe me—every man, at some point, gets their head out of their ass. And when he does, he’s going to come to this ranch, and he’s going to declare his love for you. And he’ll tell you that he’s a changed man. All I’m saying is—he’s not. But if he sees his faults and what he did, how it affected you… just listen to him, come together, and work this out. You guys are too good together for it to end.”
“He doesn’t seem to think so.”
“I know. Sometimes they’re really hardheaded.” She puts her arm around me and slides closer on the bench. “You’re a good egg.”
“An egg. I get an egg?”
She laughs. “I’m just saying, your heart is so full and so open. Zander is lucky to have found you and fallen in love with you.” Then her hand falls on my stomach. “You’re going to give them a great life.” Tears slide down my mom’s cheeks. “You guys are going to be so great together. And it just makes me?—”
“Mom, why are you crying?”
“I just love it when somebody goes through something really bad, and they get something really great out of it. And Zander is going to get you. I think he’s really, really lucky.”
She kisses my cheek. We sit there, and we hug, and the desire to see Zander is greater than ever.
“Oh!” She pulls away. “A peach. You’re a peach!”
“What?”
“Yes. Sweet and easy to like.”
I stare at her blankly, then I tilt my head. “Better than an egg, I suppose.”
She settles next to me again, putting her hand on my stomach, and I lean my head on her shoulder. This is what she’s talking about. This is what Zander never had, and I’ve taken it for granted because I don’t know what I would do without my family.
As we sit there quietly, I try to fill myself with the same hope and confidence my mother has that Zander will come for me. For us. His son and me.
Chapter Forty-Six
Zander
Beau parks the truck at the corner and kills the engine. His hand taps the steering wheel before he finally turns to look at me. “You recognize it?”
Of course I fucking recognize it. The neighborhood hasn’t changed at all. The sidewalks are still cracked. The same chain-link fences still sag from years of neglect. Same patchy grass struggles against the Texas sun. And I swear, one look, and I’m twelve again, swearing I’ll do whatever it takes to get out of here.
