“Out,” he said, leaning back slightly. He made a face. “So, how long were you and Brandon sleeping together?”
“Jesus Christ.” I leaned forward, placing my face onto the counter. “Kaleb, stop. It’s in the past, let’s leave it there.”
“Often, I’m guessing. I mean, you were only eighteen a couple of months before we left. Were you guys having sex before you were eighteen?”
I sat back up. “We slept together once. Okay. A single time.” I pinched the bridge of my nose. “So, stop asking.”
“I didn’t even know you guys liked each other like that.”
“We don’t,” I grumbled.
“Clearly you did.”
“Clearly not, because I ended up pregnant and he left.”
Kaleb snapped his mouth shut. I looked at my glass of water, rubbing my thumb along the rim of the cup.
“How have things been here with dad?” he asked.
I chewed on my cheek for a moment, knowing better than to tell him the truth. I never told him how it really was here. Our dad was the way he was, and there was no changing that. Not even his prized son.
“Fine,” I said with a shrug. “Same as always.”
“Has dad helped with Ilsa? I imagine it’s been hard to raise her alone.”
I wanted to laugh at the question, but I didn’t. I nodded and lied. “Yeah, he helped.”
Kaleb smiled. “Well, that’s good.” Kaleb patted his finger on the counter and looked nervous. “I’m sorry I was gone for so long.”
My eyebrows went up, and I tilted my head, confused. “It’s a job, Kaleb.”
He shook his head. “I could have come home, and clearly I should have.” He looked out the glass door toward where Ilsawas sitting on the back porch. She was coloring in her coloring book. Her feet swung as she hummed to herself, swaying in the wind.
“You’re here now,” I said, meaning it. As angry as I was about him being gone for over three years, I was happy he was here now.
”How was your pregnancy?”
I shrugged. “It was fine.”
He gave me a blank expression.“You’re telling me no one said anything about you being pregnant? And that it was Brandon’s kid?”
“You didn’t ask that,” I countered.
“You also avoided answering.”
I sighed. “Kaleb, can’t we just get along? Do we have to dig through the past?”
Kaleb frowned. “I’m not trying to dig up the past…I just want to know what I’ve missed.”
I wanted to tell him everything. How hard it was. How I struggled constantly and how I seemed to fuck everything up every chance I could. But it wouldn’t be fair. Kaleb wasn’t the father. He was just my brother, and I knew he meant well.
“I have photos,” I said, offering him a smile. “And you can look through all of them. See what you missed. But you don’t want to know the details of how I got here, Kaleb.”
I expected him to argue, but he nodded his head, accepting that. Just then, the glass door opened, and Ilsa spoke up. “Mommy! Look at what I colored.”
I turned as she walked toward me, showing me a picture in her book. There was a princess who had colored in with pink and purple. I smile. “Look at that. It’s beautiful.”
“Looks really good,” Kaleb said.
