"Listen, I fucked up," he said. "The second I realized you weren't Kara, I should've told you. But I didn't, because I was scared you'd panic and blow your cover, and I thought I was protecting you." He grimaced. "Which was arrogant. And wrong. Because it wasn't my call to make."
"When did you realize?" Her voice was quiet. "When did you know I wasn't her?"
"Well, no offense, but jumping the buffet line was your first mistake."
She groan-laughed despite herself.
"Lefty," he continued. "You spun that dreidel left-handed. Had just as hard a time with those scissors as me. And your cookie-frosting skills..."
"Hey!"
"What you lack in pastry arts, you make up for with singing." His voice softened. "No disrespect, but I heard your sister perform the National Anthem opening day at Yankee Stadium. When you sang during the menorah lighting? No pun intended, but her voice doesn't hold a candle to yours."
She turned to look at him finally. "Go on."
"You mentioned your college roommate with the fortune cookies. Kara didn't go to college—she got that first Vanta role at nineteen and never looked back."
"So you're a detective." She kept her tone even. "Or obsessed with my sister."
"Lady, I'm an accountant."
Still making me laugh, dammit.
"Seriously though," she said. "How did you know who I was? Like, for sure?"
Jonah's smile turned wistful. "Your face. When that idiot mentioned Lorne. That’s when I really knew for sure."
"Dead giveaway, I guess," she said lamely. "No pun intended."
Man, nothing got past this guy.
“I lost him last year.” She palmed away a tear, blinked. Good thing for waterproof eye makeup. “My tattoo, it’s in memory of him.”
“Hey, no crying on the Baller.” Jonah joked gently. “Only happy tears.”
“I’m happy he was my person. Angry I lost him. Sad is in there somewhere, but mostly I’m just pissed at the randomness. We were out on a movie date. Like Hannon joked about.” She blew out a sigh. “Lorne cracked a tooth, must’ve hit a popcorn kernel just right. We laughed about it at the time. But then…he was busy. He put it off. Typical Hollywood, you know? Rehearsals, then shooting a new film. I even made an appointment for him, but he…God, it’s so stupid. He blew it off. And I thought, at what point do you cross the line from nagging fiancée to becoming his mom? I stopped pushing. It stopped hurting. He forgot. Until.” Abscess. Sepsis. She could still hear the doctor, laundry-listing the mistakes of delaying care to the only person left in the room. “The infection spread to his tissues. His brain. His heart.”
She heard his sharp intake of breath, and took one of her own. It was a terrible memory. But the memory of Lorne?
“Zichrono Livracha,” Jonah said quietly. “May his memory be a blessing.”
She nodded. His would always be.
“I bet everyone loved him. I bet he’s got an entire forest of trees planted for him in Israel.” He touched her hand on the railing.
“They did. And he does. He was just that kind of guy.”
“When Hannon said Lorne's name, you looked... shattered.” Jonah continued gently. “And Kara wouldn't have reacted quite that way. She knew Lorne, sure. But you loved him."
Tzipi blinked back the sting in her eyes. "You saw all that?"
"I was watching you pretty closely." His ears went red. "For bodyguard reasons. Obviously."
"Obviously." A pause. "So why didn't you tell me? Once you knew?"
"Because you were drowning out there." His voice dropped. "Not a judgement. I've been struggling against the currents, too. Things are changing so fast for my friends. Babies on the way, engagements... they don't really need the go-to guy anymore. Who hasn't quite figured out what he wants to do when he grows up. The joker, the clown." He looked out at the water. "Feeling like an imposter, always falling short."
He chuckled to himself.
