So, not knowing what else I should do, I sat in one of the waiting room chairs and waited. And cried, and wiped my snotty nose, and despite how badly my hands were shaking, I sent Ro a text.
Will be late. I hit a cat with my car. I’m at the vet
Her reply came through immediately.
Oh no! Need me to come down?
No, it’s fine. Just waiting to hear
Okay. Let me know if anything changes
She was such a godsend. I cried a little at her kindness, wiping away a tear.
I couldn’t believe I’d hit a cat. Was it under my car when I’d gotten into it? Did I not see it in the backup camera?
And I’d been having such a good day...
Still a decidedly better day than the poor cat was having.
And of course, that made me start crying again.
Then a man came out of the door, holding my coat, folded neatly, his expression sad.
And I knew. I knew it was bad news.
Didn’t stop me from asking though. “Is the cat . . . did it . . . ?”
He shook his head. “She couldn’t be saved.”
I slumped back in my seat and cried, my face in my hands. “I killed her. Oh my goodness, I killed a cat. I’m a terrible person. Does she have an owner?” I looked up at him. “Oh no. Does she have an owner? Was she microchipped? Who do I have to go break the bad news to? I just moved here and someone’s going to hate me already.”
He fidgeted with my coat he was still holding. “There was no microchip. From the condition of her coat and weight, she was likely a stray.”
“Well, that’s good,” I said. I mean, it didn’t make it any better, though I was relieved I didn’t have to go tell some poor child I’d killed their beloved pet. Or a little old lady’s only companion. I wasn’t sure which would be worse. “Well, it’s notgood. That poor cat. I think it was under my car when I got in. I don’t know. I didn’t see it. It was an accident, I swear. I’ll pay the bill, whatever the cost. That’s fine.”
He made a face, though it was hard to tell through my tears and snot-sobbing, then he sat beside me and handed me a tissue. He waited until I had some composure.
“I’m sorry,” I said lamely. “I’ve never killed anything before.”
He didn’t say anything, and when I looked at him, I could see he was uncomfortable. He was a little wide-eyed,unsure of how to react or where to look. He handed over my coat and stood up.
“We are closed for the day now,” he said.
Oh.
Well then.
Right.
A little rude perhaps, but at least I got the message.
“Okay, sure,” I said, dabbing my tears as I stood. “Thanks, I guess.” I walked to the door, giving him one last look.
He shifted his weight, fidgeting his hands. He looked uncomfortable but sad. He was only young, I realized now that I took better notice of him. Twenty-something, short ashy-brown hair, blue eyes.
He squinted, uneasy, glanced at me before focusing on the wall instead. “‘Death is not the opposite of life but an innate part of it,’” he said softly.
Then turned on his heel and walked out.
