A hard lump forms in my chest and throbs like I’m wounded and bleeding out.But it’s the truth, isn’t it?How would it work?
My eyes fall away from hers, my fingers loosening on her chin.I don’t have an answer for her.
“I thought as much,” she says, and steps out of my grip.
“Penelope, wait—” but she’s turned her back on me and stepped into the bathroom, closing the door.
Fuck.
* * *
When Penelope has finished adorning her face in several coats of makeup, she does this odd movement with her fingers and knuckles and her lips change colour.If we had time, I’d love to understand how their magic works.But I’ll have to learn it from a book.Maybe Gabriel can suggest something.
She glides out of the bathroom looking angelic and slips a black and two-toned blue coloured bridesmaid dress over her shoulders and turns her back to me.She’s barely said more than three words since she left the shower.She’s gotten dressed in sheer silence.I don’t think in all the days I’ve been here I’ve ever heard her this quiet for this long.
“We should talk,” I say.
“Can you zip me up, please,” she says and inches her backside towards me.
I chew the inside of my cheek and dutifully tug her zip into place.She turns to face me, and my mouth hangs open.Her dress is long, the fabric smooth and satin-like.The blue swirls almost pirouette over the slight curves of her body to look like ocean waves.
“Wow,” I say, the words just slipping out.
She huffs out a sad little laugh.“Thank you?”
“No, no, thank you for giving me such a glorious view… Listen,” I say suddenly serious.“Earlier…”
She turns away.“It’s fine.”
“No.Listen.Please.”
That little beat of submission gets her attention.
“Go on,” she says but still can’t quite bring herself to look at me.
“I would love this to be more… you are… damn, Penelope, you’re everything I’ve ever wanted…”
“Why does it feel like there’s a ‘but’ at the end of that sentence?”she says.
A loose lock of blonde hair falls from her up-do, so I slide it back into place, lean in and kiss her.Her lips are soft and warm.She tastes like mint and roses, her lip balm no doubt.
“Because there is a ‘but,’ and I think you know it as much as I do.”
She lets out a breath so heavy I feel it in my lungs.
“We live in different cities,” she says.
“We have different lives.”I answer.
“If I wasn’t a princess…”
“And if I wasn’t a general…”
Thoughts whirl through her expression as she bites her lip.“It’s just that this has been the best couple of days I’ve had in years.Even with everything that’s been going on.”
“Me too.I just don’t see a way it can work after this.Do you?”
She shakes her head, her eyes welling.“No.”
