The nerves had my stomach knotted, even though I hadn’t eaten since lunch. “I’m good, thanks.”
Kaia took a bite. “Worried about your abs?”
“Should I be?”
Her lips curved into a teasing smile. “Nice try fishing for compliments, Asher. You won’t get any.”
A playful retort rose, but I swallowed it back. If only I could go back to treating her the way I had on the beach last Sunday.
I looked away as she finished eating.
The overhead lights cut out, replaced by multicolored beams. The woman with locs clapped her hands, calling out, “We did it!”
“That’s Imani, our instructor,” Kaia said over the noise. “I’ll be back, okay?” She darted to the center of the room, where her friends circled the instructor, hugging one another.
What would it feel like to have her arms around me?
Joder.I couldn’t think like that. I crossed my arms and leaned against the wall by the table, fighting myself. Harder than I thought.
Distance didn’t stop me from liking her. Couldn’t. She pulled me in like a fucking magnet.
Colorful beams skimmed across her face as she laughed with her friends, raising her paper cup to clink against Tessa’s. Then her blue eyes found mine. She touched Tessa’s arm and came back to me.
“Sorry. I didn’t mean to leave you alone.”
“It’s okay. It’s your party.”
Kaia traced the rim of her cup with her nail, eyes downcast. “Why did you come here today, Ash?”
“I hated that your father didn’t.”
“My father. I see.”
She took a sip, but her jaw trembled. Regret slammed into me.
I hated Russell for not showing up—but that wasn’t why I’d broken every traffic rule to make her showcase. And it wasn’t why I couldn’t tear my focus from her now.
But admitting that would only give her false hope. I couldn’t lead her on. Just the thought of hurting her made me sick.
There couldn’t be an us.
A slow song began. Couples drifted to the floor. My pulse thundered in my ears.
One.
Two.
Three.
The pressure behind my ribs tightened.
Kaia forced a smile. “I’ll get you some water. You must be thirsty.”
“No.” I caught her wrist gently, keeping her close. “Go have fun with your friends. You deserve it.”
Sadness and confusion flickered in her eyes before she turned and left me standing there.
Maybe it was for the best.
