I nod and hop out, brushing my palms on my jeans. “If Stedman can wrestle a thousand-pound steer into the dirt, the least I can do is earn a ten-minute walk with a horse.”
Allie beams. “There’s my girl.”
“You want backup?” Leo offers, camera in hand.
I shake my head. “Nope. I’ll walk back to the lodge and meet you for a snack?”
“Sounds lovely,” Leo says. “Good luck, darling.”
Irene shakes hands with a vet who is making his exit, but waves at me as I jog over, notebook still clutched in my hand.
“Hey,” I call, a little breathless.
“Hello, Roxanne,” Irene says, eyes scanning me with quiet curiosity. “Would you like a turn with Goose?”
I nod, nerves buzzing low in my stomach. “If that’s okay?”
“Of course,” she motions for Beckett to come over.
He stops when he and Goose reach us and hands me the lead rope. “He’s had a good day, but let’s give him a second to switch gears.”
I swallow and reach out slowly, taking the rope like it might vanish in my hand. Goose flicks an ear toward me but doesn’t flinch.
“I don’t bite, I promise,” I say, stepping beside him. We start walking. I keep my steps even, my breath steady. At first, Goose moves with me, matching my rhythm and my heart lifts. “Okay, okay, see? We can be friends.”
With each step, I’m hopeful that we can make a full turn around the paddock.
But then I feel it. Goose slows half a beat, his steps no longer in sync with mine. He then tilts his head slightly, like he’s checking me over. Finally, he stops.
“Oh no, no, we were doing so well,” I say, coming to a full stop as well. “What’s wrong?” I try to stare into his eyes like this is a movie and I somehow can speak to him with my mind waves. Which is impossible because mind waves aren’t a thing.
I feel the horse’s eyes on me and it’s like he knows. Like he feels the hesitation I’ve been pretending isn’t there. I glance down at my feet, then up at the horse who’s managed to become my greatest emotional lie detector.
Goose bobs his head up and down, giving a whinny.
Beckett steps quietly to my side. “That’s as far as he’ll go today, but you got further than last time.”
“I guess that’s something.”
“What do you think Goose sensed during your walk?”
I shrug. “That I’m still holding back. When I first arrived at Firebird, I was skeptical that these types of activities could really help heal someone with PTSD. I’m starting to believe, but there’s still part of me … I guess … I … I don’t?—”
Irene raises her hand to stop me. “It’s okay. Horses pick up what we don’t say. When your energy shifted, he stopped. He’s giving you feedback.”
“So what can I do?”
“Of course, the work starts with you,” Irene says. “Try to be more open when you step in the paddock. Don’t force the connection. Just invite it.”
“Keeping trying,” Beckett adds. “You’ll get there.”
I nod, gently stroking Goose’s neck before handing the rope back.
“Thank you,” I say before waving goodbye and heading back to the lodge.
not right for the role
DUKE
