“Someone from the crime scene leaked that tidbit on Facebook a few days ago. They’ve tried keeping the posts down, but it keeps popping back up, you know how social media is once a frenzy starts. Members of a prominent local family slain in an unsolved case, it’s been on my news feed almost daily since it happened.”
“Couldn’t have happened to a more wonderful family.” I couldn’t even bring myself to fake remorse for his mother and his sister. While we were dating, I had never been good enough for either of them. I bet they’d change their tune now that I was the one left breathing and they were six feet deep and currently providing an all-you-can-eat buffet to the worms indulging in their corpses.
“That’s besides the point. He’s dangerous. If I had any doubts before, they've been wiped off the table now.”
“Do you still want to stick to the ‘neither of us lives alone until he’s either dead or in jail’ agreement we struck?” I asked, picking up an egg roll and dipping it into the sweet-and-sour sauce Michelle had opened.
“I think it’s for the best, don’t you?”
“I agree with you, I was just making sure our plans hadn’t changedat all.”
“I think with Riley, it would just be easier to stay at your place. He’s been through enough changes with you gone; he’d probably like to get back on some sort of normal routine.”
“I’m sure he’d like that, though he looks like he put on a few pounds in my absence, so I’m sure he’s been just fine.” The dog licked his lips as he eyed Michelle’s food, knowing better than to come and beg me for scraps.
“He’s an emotional eater like me, and we had to stick together,” she reasoned, slipping him a small bite of her egg roll when she thought I wasn’t looking. I typically made it a habit not to feed him table scraps. After everything Michelle and I had been through the past few weeks, her spoiling my dog was the least of my concerns.
“What about your therapist?” She asked randomly, side-eyeing me in a way that dared me to try to avoid answering her question.
“What about him?” I asked innocently, taking another large sip of the chardonnay.
“Don’t even try it, Rae. It’s time to spill everything you’ve been holding back from me.”
She wasn’t wrong; she had seen something change in me during one of our visits. With so many ears near the visitors’ area and in the halls, when I was on the phone, I hadn’t been completely honest with her.
“Well, for starters, he has a nice cock and knows how to use it,” I mused, making her almost spit outher food.
“Are you serious?” She exclaimed through a minor coughing fit as she fought to swallow the bite she had taken.
“As a heart attack.”
“Do I want to ask how that started?”
Setting my fork down, I pondered how best to answer her. I wasn’t even completely sure myself how the entire ordeal started. We had chemistry from the start; that much was obvious, but the deeper connection we shared? How did I tell my sister about Brandon and what brought us together that first time? She loved me unconditionally, but I couldn’t put that on her. Michelle couldn’t even bring herself to kill bugs half the time, let alone a person. She may love me, but she’d never understand that desire.
“I’m honestly not sure, Mickey. It all happened so fast that it’s become almost like an obsession.” Bits of truth were better than a flat-out lie. I couldn’t argue with any of that.
“And he’s good to you?”
“He’s been better to me than any guy I’ve given an ounce of my attention to. We haven’t worked out the details of what exactly we are or where this is going, but I trust him.” Those details still needed to be ironed out. Daxton was insistent that I come stay with him until Craig was in custody. He was trying to understand that I needed to be in my own home. I also needed to remember to call him tonight before I went to bed, so he didn’t show up threatening to bust down my door, his words not mine.
“Good, then I hope to see him around. It would be nice to have a trustworthy guy in your life, you deserve it after everything you’ve been through.”
“I know, he really is one of a kind,” I drained my wine glass of its contents before adding, “and I wasn’t kidding about his cock.” A smile broke out on my face as my sister slapped my upper arm while laughing.
“Good sex is a bonus, but I think I’m drawing a line at asking where and how exactly you were able to get away with that in a mental institution.” She bumped her knee against mine in an affectionate way. Michelle was no stranger to being sexually experienced, having fucked more men than I cared to dream of. I would forever be her kid sister in her eyes, so she limited how graphic those conversations got despite her vast experience.
The rest of the evening, we caught up on everything, finishing off all the food she had brought to the point where our stomachs were bursting at the seams. On a normal night when my sister stayed, she would typically sleep beside me in bed. Tonight, she must have known how badly I wanted to sleep with Riley because she opted for the pull-out bed instead. The reading chair in my living room pulls out to convert into an extra bed, a little on the small side, just big enough for one of us. While she was in the shower, I made my promised phone call to Daxton, his voice making me miss the feeling of his arms around me as I let him know how I was coping with being back home.
December 19th 2021
Ifucking hate Christmas. Paint me green and call me the Grinch because I’m over the whole outdated Hallmark idea of the entire holiday. I have bitten my tongue over and over again the past few weeks, ignoring all the signs and even turning a blind eye to what’s obviously going on behind my back. Of course, I’m a coward and can’t confront him. I naively believed that he would at least straighten up for the holidays.
Michelle and I have always spent Christmas together, ever since we were children. It didn’t matter if we were dating anyone or if I was pulling a kennel shift at the vet clinic; we always spent that time together. This year, Craig has given me what feels like an ultimatum.
Even though both our families live in the same fucking town, he doesn’t want to drive anywhere. His underlying message was clear. I was “free” to spend the holiday with whoever I wanted to, only if I chose to go to Michelle’s, I better not risk showing my face at his family's house since I couldn’t make him a priority.
I didn’t want to change anything about Michelle and I’s traditions. I also knew I needed to keep the peace somehow until I could figure out this mess I had gotten myself into with him. And of course, she wasunderstanding about it. I hate myself, I really do. I told him I’d be there bright and early and didn’t say a word about visiting my sister. Only that our kennel staff had been out sick, so there was a slight possibility I might have to go in to take care of the animals that were boarding at the office.
