“No, I don’t think so. She only ever talked about my dad. Said that he was on medication for the longest time, but when my mother came into the picture, he stopped. She used to call our mother a succubus, tempting our dad into drinking and partying rather than keeping up with his medication and therapy.”
“Did that have a part in what killed your parents?”
“My grandmother believed it did. We always let Rae believe it was the drinking and the jealousy that drove my father to kill her and then kill himself. I didn’t want her to think there could be something wrong with her as well. My sister isn’t crazy; she has no signs of the disease.” Michelle was becoming defensive, possibly worrying that if she told me too much, I would have her sister kept longer. But I also got the feeling she was still hiding important information.
“Don’t worry, Miss Devlin, I agree your sister shows no sign of any mental disease other than her anxiety and how she chooses to cope with it.”
“Thank you, Mr. Bradshaw. I have to get ready for work. I’ll see you tomorrow evening.”
“Sounds like a plan, thank you for your time.”
We hung up just in time; I had ten minutes before my first client of the day would be coming in. I was glad Michelle was more forthcoming than I expected her to be, and sent the email as I promised I would, attaching a secure attachment for her to see the release form. I’d get to the bottom of whatever else she was hiding after I went through my patients' journals. The desire to know more about not just Raelynn, but her ex-boyfriend was strong. If he were the type of man that I suspected he was, he might just make it onto my list.
October 13th 2020
One of my most beloved clients passed away today. Tug was the most adorable boxer I had ever come across, with the best disposition, and always was happy to come in and see everyone.
The hard days are what make this job almost impossible. The loss of life, especially when it’s unexpected, makes it hard to overcome. I’ll never forget the screams of the owner of the first dog I ever had to perform CPR on. The poor dog didn’t make it, but the heartbreaking wails will live with me forever.
I tried calling Craig on my way home, just to have someone to talk to during the short drive. I was seeking an understanding companion, someone to lift my spirits when I felt like I couldn’t walk without wanting to cry. That was almost six hours ago. He never answered or called me back. I try not to be too needy, too emotional, or overwhelmed with my soft heart; it burdens him sometimes, and he isn’t sure how to deal with the outpouring of emotion that I can’t control.
I hope he’s enjoying whatever he’s doing. Riley is at least consistent. I can always count on a furry hug from him when I need to sit on the couch and cry to cleanse away the day.
Chaptertwelve
The Phoenix
September 26th 2023
At 6:15 in the morning like clockwork, the nurses would come in and take vitals on every patient. Blood pressure, temperature, pulse—the whole nine yards was conducted while I was still lying in my bed. I tried not to get too much of an attitude when I was woken up that early; I knew they had jobs to do. Still, you’d think working with clinically insane patients, they would have thought it better to do this after coffee and food.
The only thing that was different this morning was that instead of Shemar conducting his routine in silence, he let me know that I had a phone call waiting for me in the hallway. After his routine was complete, I grabbed a hair tie from my nightstand and wound my hair up in a messy bun before making my way into the hallway. Shemar was working his way down the ward, slowly pulling his cart with the monitor as he went, the only sound in the silence coming from the low squeak of the cart's wheels.
One of the phones hanging from the wall had been left off the receiver and was sitting on the bottom of the box that housed it. I worried for a moment, scratching at the bandage on my arm, ifsomething was wrong with Riley. My sister was the only one I knew who would be awake this early and would need to call me. None of my friends at the vet clinic would have the number to reach me here.
I stopped picking at the tape on my bandage to lift the receiver and hold it to my ear, taking a deep breath to steady my worries about Riley before speaking.
“Hello.”
“Are you ready to get the stick out of your ass and discuss our little misunderstanding? Or are you going to keep crying wolf with this overused pity party act?
My blood turned to ice, freezing me in place, leaving me unable to control myself. He was banned. He was supposed to be banned. Daxton had promised me that he had been banned from the hospital. Even though I felt fear from hearing his voice, I tried to tell myself that he wasn’t here. He couldn’t touch me right now. My hand still found its way around my neck to where I could still feel his belt, tightening against my skin, trying to drain the life out of me, trying to kill me.
It wasn’t there. It wasn’t real. It was in my head. It wasn’t real!
“Raelynn, are you going to speak to me? When are you going to understand I was only trying to help you? You’ve wanted to end your life before, you’ve felt worthless your entire life, you know what you really want in the end.” His words burrowed under my skin like scarab beetles, taking hold in my mind until tears startedforming, threatening to spill while he wove his vicious web through my brain.
“I have nothing to say to you,” I found a strength I didn’t know I possessed to try and overcome his influence, “attempted murder doesn’t exactly make me want to be sociable with psychopaths. Go back to sucking on your mother’s tit and leave me alone.”
“Raelynn,” the sound of my name and how he said it, like scolding a small child. My name was venom from his tongue, in an attempt to weaken me. “No one is going to believe you after seeing everything you’ve already done to yourself. It’s not normal. I want to put this in our past and work towards a future.”
“There is no future with you,” I could feel my voice quivering as my conviction threatened to waiver, and reminded myself I had the safety of distance on my side, “you’ve been cheating on me for years. Go bother one of the other girls, I’m done.”
“If you don’t give us a chance, I’m not going to have a choice but to finish what I started. You’re bringing it upon yourself.”
I slammed the receiver down, ending the phone call, my hands still shaking, not just from hearing his voice but from everything he had to say. The problem was he wasn’t wrong. At one point in my life, I had thought it was better to end it all. If it hadn’t been for the promise I had made to Michelle, I would have died long before my parents had. His voice made me sick to my stomach. Not just metaphorical, but a physical embodiment of the fear I felt. Craig was my worst nightmare personified, a demon with theability to walk in the daylight. I ran back to my room and opened the bathroom door only to find myself face down in the toilet.
Contents from dinner last night spewed from my mouth as I retched uncontrollably into the basin. I had never considered myself to be a weak person in the past, so the fact that he had this effect on me made me feel small and want to curl into an impenetrable ball. The walls wouldn’t stop spinning as I flushed the toilet, riding the room from the smell of fresh vomit.
