“You won’t—we won’t. This is the end. The army’s coming—”
“No, Jann.I’m not hiding for you anymore.”
“Hiding? What—?” He frowned as I wrestled the leash off my wrist and threw it at him, then backed away. When I didn’t stop, his eyes got wary. “Dee, what are you doing?”
“I refuse to be a part of this anymore. Tell them you killed me. Tell them I was a traitor. Tell them whatever the fuck you want—but I amneverstanding by while those disgustingcuntsharm women, ever again!”
Jann raised his hands, trying to soothe me. “I know that was hard, I hated it too. But I wasn’t—”
“What the hell is going on?” Yilan’s quiet voice rose from the doorway behind me. Jann’s eyes widened further and it was as if a curtain dropped over him—even over the bond. He straightened, his posture becoming casual. His face went blank. Expressionless.
Cold.
All the emotion and caution that had been singing through the bond cut off, like it had been snipped with scissors.
He was capable of that, I realized. Able to just shut himself down. Cut it off. Steel himself andnot feel—and that’s why he could be there when they did these terrible things. That’s why he could fake it.
I knew he didn’t want to rape me. I knew he wouldn’t choose that for anyone else. But that didn’t change the fact that he’d just stood there while that poor woman was—
“Diadre, what is going on?” Yilan insisted.
I shook my head. Grief, fear, and a terrible wave of disgust washing through me, as I stared at my mate. My eyes never left his.
“Nothing,” I whispered. “That’s exactly the fucking problem.”
33. The Weight of Fear
SOUNDTRACK:God Complexby Henri Weaver
~ YILAN ~
Jann flinched. Diadre stared at him, like he’d carved her heart out.
I glared at Jann. “What did you do?”
He turned on me, snarling, but it was Diadre that answered.
“I told you—nothing. That’sthe problem.”
Jann’s attention snapped back to her, and he started towards her, but she backed away, shaking her head. I saw the shadow in his eyes. Watched him falter. But it was Diadre that Ifelt.
Something was very, very wrong.
“Somebody needs to start explaining themselvesveryquickly,” I muttered, glaring at Jann. He wouldn’t take his eyes off Diadre. I didn’t know if he was speaking to her through their bond, or if he just pleaded with his eyes. But the frustration, anger, and fear that had been twisting my guts up for the past two hours, came to a volcanic head.
“Would somebody tell mewhat the hellis happening?!”I whisper-screamed at both of them.
Diadre broke free of his gaze, and turned to me.
Jann twitched and turned on his heel, marching back to the door through which they’d entered.
“Where are you going?” Diadre demanded.
“To keep you and our baby alive,” he snarled. “You can hate me later.” Then he stormed out, slamming the door behind him.
I was shocked. Jann had beensogentle with Diadre since she’d gotten pregnant. Hovering like an old woman, when he wasn’t painting on that steely façade for the Neph.
The moment the door slammed, Diadre dropped her face into her hands and sobbed. I rushed to her, as the lock on the door clicked. Jann knew it wouldn’t stop us leaving, but we were all still playing into this lie that I didn’t exist, that Diadre was restricted like a normal human woman, and that he was in charge.
