“He has,” I told him immediately. Gall went still, so I kept going. “Multiple times. And it’s terrifying. I’m your ally, Gall. Your advocate. I want tohelpyou get Istral away from him. Because I know we can. Yilan did it—she resisted him, and he fled. That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you. Lucifercan’thurt you unless you listen to him. It’s half the reason he’s left you here with me! Because he can’t stand to be in the presence of anyone who knows he can’t control them.”
Gall blinked and his face dropped, and for a second I thought I’d gotten through. He dropped his head into his hands and muttered. I put my hands over his and leaned in, whispering to him. “I’m here, Gall. You aren’t alone. Don’t let him convince you that you have to do this alone. You don’t. I’m staying right here, and I’ll help you through this.”
“Through what?”
“Through whatever comes.”
Gall was quiet and still. Then his eyes darkened. “It’s notyourmate and baby in Lucifer’s hands now. You just want my crown, so you’ll tell me anything to make me defy him. But I won’t. I won’t!”
His hands snapped out to shove me again, harder this time. I was caught off-guard and staggered, but caught myself after two steps.
Another roll of cries rose in the hallway outside—and as if it were a call to him personally, Gall sucked in a breath andran.
I cursed and took off after him.
~ DIADRE ~
Jann darted out of the hallway outside the royal chamber, and straight into the shadows near a pillar so I could join him. It took me a moment longer to reach him, only because I’d hesitated to look back at Yilan, and plead for her trust.
When I materialized next to him, Jann exhaled.‘Go back to the rooms. Let us handle this. You can’t risk—’
‘Jann, stop. If we don’t win this, there will be no life for me or our son. None. I’m fighting, just like you are.’
‘I know,’he said, his head sinking back against the wall behind him, pulling me closer. I went eagerly, though we had no time. Torment twisted in his chest. He’d begged for my forgiveness after hurting Melek. Insisted that he hadn’t intended to reach his heart—that they’d had a plan in the event Melek was ever captured—a way for him to convince Lucifer, or his loyalists, of Jann’s alliance.
It had all gone horribly wrong. I was still shaking. Still notentirelysure… except that Jann regretted it now. I could feel the weight of self-loathing in his chest.
Thank God for Istral.
The rumble and screams of fighting drew closer, louder. Bodies running in the nearby halls.
‘We have to go.’I put a hand on his chest. This was so difficult. He’d been locked inside his own head and heart alone for so long. I was gladsomethinghad finally shocked him out of his tunnel vision, but he was still in so much turmoil.
‘Dee… I love you. More than my own life.’
‘I know.’Cursed tears! This wasn’t the moment.
Jann pulled me close, his hands shaking.‘You need to understand… the moment Lucifer learns I resist him, he’ll come for me. My only chance now, is to take as many of our enemies out as I can before he reaches me.’
‘Jann, no—if he couldn’t take Melek, he can’t take you!’
He continued as if I hadn’t even spoken.‘If I’m lost… if I’m gone… you have to leave this kingdom. Promise me you’ll flee. Pay any price to get yourself out of Ebonreach, and back to your family. Raise our boy in the protection of the Shadows of Shade. It’s the only way I can… the only way I canconceiveof defying the Fallen.’
I had to swallow back a painful lump in my throat. We both knew if he died and I didn’t, the Neph would never let me leave, but…‘You have my word.’
He kissed me with a cry of desperation, and I clung to him just as frantically.
“I love you, Dee,” he whispered in my ear, his voice vibrating in his chest against me. “I’m sorry, I… I’m sorry I was weak.”
I kissed him, then held his face in my hands, and met his eyes fiercely. “You areinfuriating,Jann, but you are the furthest thing from weak.” I swallowed hard, forcing my body to keep my voice strong. “I love you, and I’ll see you when this battle is over.”
He nodded, but his eyes were dark with resigned despair.
We kissed once more—a frantic, gasping moment. Then we released each other.
In an unsettling blink, as he straightened, Jann’s fear and desperation just… melted away. One moment I held my trembling mate, the next I stared up at a cool, calm, determined soldier, eyeing the battlefield ahead and planning his strategy.
It was disturbing to see that after such a terrible moment, he could so quickly switch off emotion and return to the task at hand.
