Loving.
Jesus, she was killing him. Sex talk, rowdy jokes, and tenderness?
She shrugged, her sly smile turning him on all over again. “Hmm. I’ll think about it.”
“You do that. And while you’re doing that, think aboutthis…”
Deacon kept stealingglances at his silent passenger as they rode the ferry from Bainbridge to Seattle to meet Noel. They sat in the parked car, the music turned on low.
Noel had found someone they needed to talk to, and he wanted Deacon there. Noel had tried to persuade Solene to stay with Hammer and Addy, but Deacon refused to let Solene out of his sight. Now that he’d realized how much she meant to him, he didn’t trust anyone else to protect her.
It made no sense, but there it was. Deacon had it bad for Solene “I Hate Men” Hansen.
He understood her so much better now, and everything he knew only made it that much more difficult to deny his feelings. He felt a kinship with her, to know a survivor who’d overcome the odds to find, if not happiness, then at least a measure of success. And all on her own.
Deacon had never been given anything in his life that he hadn’t taken by force. Even the women he’d been with had been a result of years of practice to learn seduction. Sure, they’d thrown themselves at him later, but not until after he’d laid the groundwork to get them in the first place.
But Solene. She gave herself fully. And even after, he felt her fighting to hold herself back from him, the same way he battled his need to give her everything. He’d all but laid himself bare for the woman. To tell her he thought he’d fallen in love with her would be the ultimate in stupidity.
As Solene had said, she thought she’d learned the hard way to not put herself out there anymore. Deacon, for all the similar hard knocks that he’d gone through, wanted to make the mistake of trying again. He wanted Solene’s affection, that special place in her heart that would be just for him.
Hell, the woman could own him by simply crooking her finger. That she had no idea she had such power was both good and bad. Someday she’d realize it, and it would be his downfall. He knew it. Just as he understood that if something ever happened to her, he’d never be the same.
“You okay?” she asked. “Your silence is heavy.”
“That’s deep.”
She rolled her eyes. “As deep as the crap you keep trying to sell me. What’s the deal with this guy we’re meeting, anyway?”
Deacon turned to face her. “I don’t know. Noel’s been pretty close-mouthed. I just need you close so I’m not distracted.”
“By what?”
“By worrying about your sorry ass, okay?”
“I thought us having sex solved the problem of being distracted.” She put her hand on his thigh, and like lightning, his body tensed all over.
“It only works if we have sex constantly,” he said, shooting for earnest. “A few times a night isn’t enough.”
Solene grinned. “Oh?”
“Yeah. I figure if I’m buried inside you, I won’t be thinking about sex because I’ll be doing it, leaving me to think about other things instead.”
She just looked at him. “You’re telling me you can think when we’re together?”
He blew out a breath and groaned. “No. God, you’re a pain in my ass. Soannoying.”
She blinked.
“I can’t think about anything but you lately,” he growled, then wanted to smack himself for being too honest. What the hell. In for a penny… “I have a job to do, but lately that job revolves around your favorite color. Your preference for tea over coffee. How much you hate love-talk and sentimental shit and how you’re dying to give me that ass, but you don’t want me to know you need a reaming.”
She snorted. “Dream on.”
“Hey, I tried.” He hated that he couldn’t keep his mouth shut with her. Where the hell his suave self gone? At this rate, Solene would soon know he was weak, a goner,in lurveand all that sentimental horseshit. Then she’d wield her power over him like a queen.
She gave him a shy smile instead. So sweet he could do nothing but stare.
“Deacon, you must really want my ass to be so adorably miserable.”
