“Nursery maid, then?”
“Well, I don’t like the sound of that. That’s beneath you, Miss Lamb.”
“No it isn’t.”Not anymore.
“What I mean to say, is that a woman of your character and education could do so much more, could be anything she wanted.”
“But you need a nursemaid.”
“Anne needs a nursemaid. I ...”
“What?”
“For Anne’s sake, I wish you would stay on as nursemaid, governess, what have you. But quite frankly, I don’t.”
“You don’t want me to be Anne’s nurse.”
“No.”
Charlotte felt as though she’d been slapped and drenched with icy water at the same time. She’d thought he admired her way with his daughter—that he admired her in general.
“I shall leave immediately.”
“No!” he all but shouted.
She looked at him, stunned by his uncharacteristic outburst.
He sighed and said more gently, “Forgive me. I know I am a broken shell of a man with little to offer you. But still, I ask you.”
“Ask me what?”
“To stay.”
“As what?”
“Why must we define it? Can you not give me more time?”
“I’m afraid I do not understand, sir. I am an unmarried woman.
I cannot stay under your roof unless I am employed by you in a legitimate capacity. Tell me you are not asking me to be your ... to be your ...”
“To be my what?” he said defensively.
“Do not make me say it.”
“Say what?” He looked nearly angry now. “What is it that is so odious to you?”
“Dr. Taylor!”
“No, tell me. Be my what?”
She frowned, looked about her, then whispered tersely, “Mistress.”
The man looked stricken. “Oh, Miss Lamb. Forgive me. No wonder you looked so ill. Certainly you know by now how highly I think of you. I would never make such a proposition to anyone, least of all to you.”
She knew he meant it as a compliment; still, it hurt her feminine pride. She was not the sort of woman he would want for himself.
At least, not anymore.
