“What?”
“You say it like you hate it.”
“That's not it.” I take a deep breath, then exhale hard. “I have fucking feelings for him.”
Stronger ones than I want. Thedestroy-anyone-who-hurts-himkind. The kind that make me want to keep him even when I shouldn't.
The kind that weren't supposed to happen.
And yet . . . here we fucking are.
Chapter 20
Ryan
Bathroom's still a sauna, so my new briefs stick to my damp skin as I pull them on. I bought them last week for Connor.
For myself.
Maybe I can stop being so fucking broken if I try hard enough.
I shake my head, gripping the counter.
Connor’s been patient. Accepting. Works with me instead of running. Even after I told him about what happened.
But I don’t want to be like this.
Still can’t believe I let him in. Or that I fell asleep on him a few days ago. I woke when he moved to get up. Wanted to pull him back, but the way he struggled to swallow . . . he was still in pain.
So, I let him leave.
His father needs to be in jail.
The mirror is still fogged, but I can see enough. These briefs barely count as underwear. Light pink, thin material, and a string for sides. My cock's already half-hard just thinking about Connor seeing me in them.
I want him to see what he does to me. Want him to touch me . . . without freaking out. Without the shitty flashbacks.
Maybe I should stop by the counseling center.
Once I got to Crestwood last year, all the progress I had made vanished. Didn’t see the point of talking to someone new just to get me through college? What would happen after?
But maybe it’s worth a shot to try again.
I turn on the faucet and splash cold water on my face.Five things I can see. Hotel towels. My reflection. The steam—Fuck it. I'm fine.
After drying off, I take a deep breath and release it slowly. Time to see if Connor likes his surprise.
I open the door and step into the room.
My husband’s stretched out on his bed, laptop on his chest, brows scrunched. Probably still pissed we lost to Quinnipiac. I played well. Coach Harper even pulled me aside to say my positioning had been solid. Team just hasn’t clicked yet since we have lots of new players this year. Hopefully, we win against Boston College in the morning.
Connor looks at me and sucks in an audible breath. My skin heats, nipples tightening, cock swelling as his gaze roams over every minuscule inch of my body. His eyes lock onto my crotch and he groans. Loudly.
I look down. Oh, fuck. The light pink briefs are already soaked through at the tip.
My whole face burns as my cock swells even more, stretching the fabric so it’s practically see-through.
He closes the laptop, pushing it off to the side, and sits upright, swinging his legs off the bed. “Get over here.”
