Alone.
My heart beats wildly. But Connor doesn’t say anything, just unpacks. So, I continue to do the same.He has so much stuff: expensive clothes, a top-of-the-line laptop, the newest Nintendo Switch. The contrast makes me feel small.
Poor.
Less than.
I fold my faded shirts quickly, tucking loose threads into seams so they won’t show. Connor watches as I walk to the dresser. His hazel eyes linger for a moment too long before he tears his gaze away.
Ducking my head, I start lining up my shirts edge to edge. It’s one of the few things that gives me a small sense of control since the day my life went sideways eight years ago.
“This the infamous bear?”
I spin around and find Connor holding my teddy bear. No. I grit through my teeth, nostrils flaring. “Put. Him. Down.”
“Seriously? You're nineteen and still sleep with a stuffed animal?” Connor's laugh is cruel, like sharp blades of ice.
“I said put him down!”
“Or what?” He tosses the bear up and it tumbles through the air just like . . . Sarah's body.
One second I'm by the dresser, the next I'm slamming Connor against the wall, my forearm across his throat. The bear drops to the floor between us.
“You threatened my scholarship. My life.” My voice doesn't sound like mine. Instead, it’s a deep rumble. I lean closer, looming over him. “Leave. My fucking. Bear. Alone.”
Connor goes rigid, his jaw slackens for a split second, breath hitching as his pupils dilate. His hands fly up, fingers splaying as if to steady himself, then curl into fists against my forearm. His chin juts forward, the line of his mouth hardening. “And what if I don't?”
I press my forearm harder into his throat, lifting him just enough that his toes barely touch the ground. My pulse pounds in my ears, pressure building at my temples. “You took my freedom when you forced me to marry you. Took my first kiss. I won’t let you take my bear.”
He goes still, mouth half open, and he just stares for a second. “Your . . . first kiss?”
My face and neck heat. While there’s a few reasons I've never kissed anyone, there’s mainly one. No one wants someone like me. Someone broken, scarred, and worth nothing.
Connor smirks, and I dig in more, my nostrils flaring, teeth bared. He glares at me even as he now sputters, punching my arm, his face turning purple.
No. No. No.
The last time I lost it, people ended up in the ER. And I ended up in a group home. I won’t hurt anyone like that again. Not even Connor.
I retreat so fast I almost trip. When his color returns to normal, I snatch the bear off the floor, clutching it to my chest. “Don't touch him again. Don't even look at him.”
He rubs his throat, glaring at me. “The bear is off limits. For now.”
“Get fucked.”
Wrong thing to say because Connor explodes forward, grabbing the front of my gray T-shirt. He backs me into the desk, snarling through clenched teeth.
“Growing some balls?” His breath is hot against my face, watermelon sweet. “Maybe you need a reminder of who owns you.”
Everything narrows to points of contact—his knuckles against my chest, his thigh between mine, the way his eyes keep dropping to my mouth. My skin prickles, pulse slams against my throat. Something deep in my gut coils, hot and wrong and—
No!
I wrench sideways, stumbling as I put distance between us. My entire body trembles as my heart races, lungs closing. Bile creeps up my throat. My fingers dig into the teddy bear, gripping it like a lifeline.
He’s too close. Tooclose. Too close.
Connor reaches out, then violently jerks his hand back. But he doesn’t move, only stands there.
