And dragging Colt from her, listening to him scream, haunts my goddamn nightmares still. I’ve lost too many people I cared about. Won’t lose my little fawn, that’s for sure.
Cal shoves against me, but I’m bigger so it’s futile. Yet he does it again. And again, going on until he’s slapping my chest. “You said I was yours, but you’re treating me differently. Stop it.”
“Youaremine.” This time I wrench his chin up, forcing his gaze to mine. “Which means I can treat you however the fuck I want.”
His brows scrunch. “Only you’re not treating me as yours. If I was, you’d at least be trying instead of being a chicken shit.”
My fingers tighten and he grimaces.
“Dammit.” I release him, then shove past back to the bedroom and start getting dressed. I look out the bedroom door down the hall, watching as Cal has his back to me.
Not sure what kind of miracle I was expecting in a week and a half, but he still needs to gain more weight to be back to where he was before.
“Going hunting.”
Cal turns, gives me the finger, then slams the bathroom door shut again.
My fingers clench and flex a few times. Need to get out of the house. My blood is boiling. His attitude and my guilt do not play well together.
If only I hadn’t screwed up so bad, things could be different. Wouldn’t be second guessing everything I do, wondering if that would be what sends him running again.
Maybe he’s right.
He hasn’t shown any signs of wanting to leave. If anything, he goes out of his way to let me know he wants to be here.
Even when I set up a separate bedroom for him the day he came back, he shoved right past me and climbed into my bed. Been there ever since.
And every morning I wake up with him in my arms.
I rub my hands over my face. Could try meeting him halfway.
Gotta figure something out.
Chapter 2
The silence of the forest swallows every step as I tread softly through the snow-laden trees. A thin layer crunches under my boots while flakes continue to drift down through the barren branches overhead. I keep my crossbow tight in hand, finger resting on the trigger.
The cold air cuts at my weathered cheeks, but after four years in these mountains, it don't bother me none. Easier out here than some of the field training exercises I used to have to do before the world went to shit. Nothing like being in Alaska during the dead of winter running training ops. But I had my teammates with me. Miss those days.
Miss Rex and Colt and Talia.
Proud of that damn girl. Always will be. She was one of the most badass operators. No one messed with what she considered hers, which was us—her family.
I continue to trudge through the woods, keeping a sharp eye out for any movement. Can't ever be too cautious. Might be hunting for food but you never know what other dangers lurk.
Cal should be safe. Taught him how to use the shotgun.
I let out a sigh, my breath fogging in the frigid air. Wish I could stop the guilt that eats at me every day. I want to make it work with him.
No.
I have to make it work. Went fucking insane without him.
Four years ago, I stayed behind to protect him. Wasn’t my original plan. Rex and Colt had a lot of shit to say about it, assholes even abandoned me. Though Colt had been distancing himself from us before then. Even tried to skin himself to remove the tattoo.
I swallow past the growing lump in my throat.
But how the fuck could I have left Cal alone? He wouldn’t have survived.
