Alexei turns my hand over, brushing his fingers over my knuckles like before. "I'd like that." His eyes bore intensely into mine. "Promise me if I let you in, you won't use it against me, won’t try to take my dreams away."
"I would never." I lace our fingers together. "I care about you, Alexei."
The waitress arrives with our food, forcing us apart. We eat in silence, my mind spinning. I can’t imagine dedicating my life to something while forsaking the rest. And why would he ask me not to take his dreams away?
My eyes drift over Alexei. I’ve never seen him hesitant. Even the other night when he gave his first blowjob ever, he was all in.
But the concept of a relationship worries him. Not that I expected his sexuality to be solved in one day. I just didn’t thinkdatingwould make him nervous. Then again, it sounds like he’s never done that before. And not by choice.
What kind of man raised him?
After we finish eating, Alexei walks me back to my dorm. When we come to a stop in front of my building, he shoves his hands in his pockets. "I had a nice time."
"Me too."
We stand there smiling at each other like idiots until I can't take it anymore. I grab the front of his jacket, pulling him down into a kiss, which he returns eagerly.
Alexei breaks the kiss and rests his forehead against mine, his eyes fluttering closed. "What are you doing to me, Eli?" His voice is a ragged whisper.
"I could ask you the same thing." I smooth back a lock of his dark brown hair. "I've never felt so connected to someone either."
He nuzzles against my neck, placing a soft kiss below my ear, and I cling to him, wishing we could stay like this forever. No expectations, no pressure to be anything but ourselves.
Alexei pulls back, clearing his throat gruffly. "I should go. Early practice tomorrow."
"Okay."
Except I don’t want him to go. I want to drag him inside, curl up into his stupidly muscular body, and fall asleep.
But that’s selfish.
So, I shove my hands into my pockets, shoulders slumping, and swallow the tiny whine threatening to escape as he walks away, disappearing into the night.
Oh, holy hell.
I'm in love with Alexei Petrov. Truly, madly in love.
Chapter 9
Alexei
Walking along the cobblestone path leading back to my dorm, I rake my hand through my hair, letting out a long sigh. Sure, I’ve got practice in the morning. Makes logical sense to go back to my dorm and get some rest.
But every bone in my body screams to return to Eli.
The kiss didn’t help much, but it’s more than that. Sharing how his sister inspired that sculpture touched something deep in me, as if he is capable of seeing all of me too.
Like he’ll accept me for who I actually am, not what he wants me to be.
I won’t deny how fucking good it felt when he called our outing a date. And damn if I don’t ache to see his face, hear hisvoice, feel him pressed against me, to bury myself inside him permanently.
Turning back in the direction I came from, my boots eat up the sidewalk as my strides lengthen, and the few students in my path scramble out of my way.
Good, because if they hadn’t moved fast enough I’d run them the fuck over. No one better keep me a second longer from getting to my Solnyshko.
My brows lift and I shake my head. Never been one to use terms of endearment toward anyone.
I knock hard on the door, my knuckles colliding aggressively with the hard surface, and when Eli opens the door, I shove him back as I step in, glancing quickly around the room. “You’re alone.”
