My skin feels all prickly. I don’t want her pity. I don’t want anyone’s pity. I know I’m a mess.
“How was Lily?” I try my hardest to sound sincere and not bitter, but by the way Casey’s eyebrows pinch together, I don’t think I’m successful.
“Good. Everyone was good.” Casey leans back into the couch and reaches for a throw pillow to wrap her arms around. “It was fun catching up with everyone.”
I nod.
We fall into a weird silence, both focusing our attention on the television. I picked a random season ofSurvivorfor background noise. We both watch absently.
After a couple long minutes, Casey stands. “Um. I think I’m going to shower.”
“Okay.”
“Okay.”
Casey hesitates, and I think she’s going to say more, but then she leaves. After her bedroom door shuts behind her, I deflate. My entire body sagging into the couch. I cover my face with my blankets and groan.
That was weird, right? Why was that so weird? My phone dings, and my first thought is Nina posted something new. I may or may not have turned on her notifications because I’m a fucking masochist. But there are no new notifications on my screen. That’s strange. I definitely heard a ding. I shrug and focus onSurvivorwhen I hear another ding.
No new notifications on my phone. What the hell?
Out of the corner of my eye, I catch a phone screen fade to black and realize it’s Casey’s phone. It must have fallen out of the pocket of her board shorts when she was sitting next to me and didn’t notice. I grab it to take to her when the screen lights up and I see Lily’s name.
Lily:
Come over later
My throat runs dry, and my chest tightens. Oh, shit. I feel an ache of jealousy and … anger? I’m confused by the anger and force myself to think when it dawns on me. I’m angry that Lily gets to sleep with Casey and still be best friends, and it hits me how badly I want that.
I want to be the one touching Casey tonight. Not Lily, but me. I want to explore her body. I want to know how she tastes. I want to know what she sounds like when she comes.
So, no, Lily,I think to myself with a knowing smirk at her text message.Casey will not be coming over later.
Not if I have anything to say about it.
The bathroom light shines through the crack under the door. I hesitate, my fist raised, but I don’t knock. It hits me what I’m about to do, and I freeze. Casey is in there. Wet andnaked.
I chicken out and flee, but barely make it halfway across the room, when I stop dead. I close my eyes and imagine Casey’s bright and warm smile. This isCasey. The woman who has never once judged me or made me feel embarrassed. She told me we can do as much or as little as I want; the only reason we didn’t last night was because stupid-ass Marcus. I’m the one who changed my mind, but only because I didn’t want to jeopardize our friendship. But if it’s possible to do this and not mess anything up, why the hell don’t we?
I whirl around andoof. I collide with Casey and topple backward.
“Whoa.” She reaches out with one hand to steady me. The other hand keeps her towel in place. The towel that is currently wrapped around her very naked body. The top sits dangerously low on her chest and highlights the swell of her breasts. Heat pools low in my belly.
“Whoa! You okay?” she asks.
I shake my head, peeling my gaze away from her wet cleavage and up to her eyes. “Yeah. Um …”
And I can’t focus. Her tawny blonde hair is dark from the shower. She has it pulled over her shoulder, and the ends drip water down her skin to the beige cotton towel.
What does her body look like underneath that towel? Will her skin be all soft and warm?
“Dakota?” she prompts. “What’re you doing in here?”
“I. Um. Don’t go.”
“Go where?”
“Don’t—” My throat seizes up. Casey’s eyebrows pinch,her head tilts to the side in an expression of utter bafflement, and it hits me she obviously never saw Lily’s text, so I hold up her phone.
