“Nissa,” he drawls as he leans against the doorframe, his arms flexing as he crosses them over his broad chest.
Ophe would be stripping right here at the threshold. An unladylike snort bubbles out of me. He is undeniably handsome. Hell those muscles are impressive but it only makes me wonder what Cillian looks like without a shirt.
My mouth goes dry. Internally cursing, I shove aside the thought. Caspien eyes me curiously as the humor evaporates. I run my hand through my hair and look up into his intense gaze. “I was hoping we could talk.”
“Come on in.” He gestures as he pushes the door further open, exposing the deep red interior.
I freeze. I’m not really sure why. Guilt? My twin sister always did her best to keep me away from her mate. But more than that, I’m shocked at how the magic hiding in my veins flares to life. Could this be some sign that there would be a bond between us if I went through with this? If so, I’m not sure I want a mate bond.
Turn around, Nissa. Leave.
I taste bile as my stomach pitches and twists. It doesn’t matter what the magic is trying to tell me. I’m leaving Castara as soon as I get answers about Nova being at the portal. Hopefully soon if he can give me some information.
I will my magic to calm and take a determined step forward. Multiple sources of fae fire light the large room. Intense heat and the smell of spices hit me the moment I cross the threshold. The rumpled black satin sheets look as if the fire is dancing across them as Caspien sits down on the edge of his bed. He leans back, making the muscles of his chest flex.
Magic is warring inside of me.Leave.
I settle across the room on a scorched leather chair and lace my hands together in my lap, my back straight. I understand what other females see in him, but it just doesn’t do anything for me.
He watches me and waits while I glance around the room, gathering my thoughts. Metal shelves cover one wall, filled with an assortment of fire-forged items, including the simple gold crown he wore when we were children. It looks so tiny now, with one tip bent inward.
“How are the lessons going?” he asks. “I know how difficult they could be for Nova. I can’t imagine trying to absorb all that information so fast.” He looks at me like he genuinely cares about my answer. Like he sincerely cared about her.
How could that be possible with what I’ve learned?
“It’s been exhausting, but they’re going well,” I respond cautiously. I look at anything in the room other than him. I played out this conversation over and over in my head last night, but I can’t seem to dive into it.
“I’m sure it will all be worth it once you’re on the throne as queen.”
My magic won’t settle. The bile threatens to make a reappearance. I don’t want the throne. I’ve never wanted the throne.
“I don’t know how Nova did it for so long. I would think the lessons would wear on someone after so many years of it.” And based on the emotionless Princess I saw last Beltane, they did. I just didn’t understand what was happening with her at the time. It makes me sad to understand her more now than I ever did when she was alive. I could have been there for her if she had let me in.
Leave. Go now.
I ignore the nagging voice in my head. I owe it to Nova to see this through.
He makes a non-committal hum. “She understood the sacrifice that came along with this life—and the benefits.”
I bristle, my eyes snapping to him. Sacrifice? Like watching your betrothed cheat on you repeatedly? I shove down the accusation I want to fling at him, and pull the wind deep in my chest. “So she wasn’t struggling with this life? Maybe wanting something different?” I refuse to look away now, trying to gauge his reaction.
I’m here for answers, for some indication as to why Nova would be at the furthest edge of the Elite City with no Guardians. But a small part also wants to feel a little closer to my sister. The last two weeks have offered me more insight into her life than I’ve ever had before, made me feel more connected to my twin than since they sent me away.
“If you came to ask me something, Nissa, just come out and say it.” There’s an edge to his voice, but nothing shows on his face.
I may not understand my magic yet, but I can tell it’s sending me warning signals to back off. I can’t find it in myself to heed that warning. If anyone should be asking questions about Nova’s death, shouldn’t it be Caspien? His betrothed was attacked and killed in cold blood.
So, why does it seem like I’m the only one who wants answers?
Well, other than Cillian. Unless he’s been lying to me.
I set my jaw. “I’m just wondering what would send my rule-following sister to Terrania and the portal to the human world. It isn’t in her elemental lands. Why was she out there, especially with no Guardians? I’m curious if you think your cheating played any part.” I cut my eyes to his bedsheets, eyebrows raised in question. I didn’t plan on being so direct, but I can’t hold my tongue any longer.
“Cheating?” An expression that oddly resembles amusement crosses Caspien’s features. “I’d think you of all of us would relate to wanting some freedom. None of us has had any say in our own lives from the moment we were born. Nova and I both understood the pressures. She wanted me to be able to blow off steam, wanted me to have a little freedom. And it washeridea, not mine.”
Nova’s idea…?She’d always seemed so jealous.
“So no, Nissa,” he says, “I don’t believe it wasmyfault that she was there that day. I was devoted to Nova in my own way. If I could change what happened at the human portal, I would.”
