We raised our glasses and clinked them together.
The last time I’d pressed my key fob against the door to this condo, I was also returning from a boozy lunch with Max, though this time I wasn’t nearly as drunk as I was the day my entire world turned upside down.
The apartment was exactly as I’d left it, making me wonder if Teddy had been staying with his parents the entire time I was gone. The remainder of the boxes from my office were still stacked against the wall in the living room. They were filled with things that I thought were essential just a few weeks ago. Now I felt like if I tossed them in the trash without opening them, I wouldn’t even miss them. I drew in a deep breath and tried to focus on the reason I’d come to the condo in the middle of the day in the first place. My large suitcase was still sitting neglected in the back of the closet, collecting dust, reminding me that it had been years since I’d taken a vacation. I’d begun to fill it with clothes when I heard the front door beep, then slam shut.
“Emma!” Teddy’s voice bellowed through the house. There was no way he’d decided to randomly come home in the middle of the day. He must have instructed the concierge to call him when I came back. Was anyone loyal these days? I’d bet Franklin wouldn’t have been so quick to sell me out if he’d known that I was the one responsible for his holiday bonuses every year. “Emma!” his voice called again.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. The fact that I wasn’t ready to face him didn’t matter. There was no way I was sneaking out of this condo without hearing whatever Teddy had to tell me.
“I’m in the bedroom,” I called. I saidthebedroom, notourbedroom. I hadn’t even thought about it, but this didn’t feel like our bedroom anymore. This didn’t even feel like my house.
“Emma”—he burst into the room and wrapped his arms around me—“where the hell have you been? I’ve been worried sick about you.” He released his death grip on me and held me away from his body so he could look me in the eye. “You haven’t tried to call me. Ma says your mailbox has been full for weeks. You’re not replying to emails and texts.” I opened my mouth to speak, but he cut me off when his eyes fell on my half-filled suitcase. “What the hell is this?” His hands fell away from my shoulders, and he took a step back. “Where are you going?”
“I’m going back to the farm.” I held his gaze for a moment so he would know that I was serious, before I went back to packing my bag.
“You’re going back to—what?” he spluttered. He yanked away the T-shirts I’d pulled out of my drawer and threw them on the bed. “Emma, you need to talk to me. You can’t just disappear without a trace for weeks and then show back up, pack a bag, and disappear again.”
“Teddy, stop being dramatic.” I rolled my eyes, grabbed the T-shirts, and tucked them into the corner of the suitcase. “I didn’t disappear without a trace. You knew exactly where I was, and you would have known how to get there if you had come with me to the will reading.”
He rolled his eyes and took a step back.
“This again. How many times can I apologize for not going to that will reading with you before you’ll stop throwing it in my face every chance you get?”
“I’m not throwing it in your face.” I definitely was, but I couldn’t help it. I’d long gotten over the fact that Teddy failed to be there when I needed him in a crucial moment. Hell, after the last ten years, I considered it a regular occurrence. It was just another reminder of why I needed to get out of this condo, away from this man, and back to the farm, where my life was slowly starting to make sense. I briefly wondered how differently this last month would have gone if Teddy had come with me to the will reading. I quickly pushed that thought away and slammed my suitcase shut. “I’m simply stating a fact. And I don’t want an apology. I just want to get a few more of my things and get back on the road before it gets too late.” I dragged the suitcase off the bed and wheeled it toward the door. Teddy made no move to help me carry the bag, which didn’t surprise me. Instead, he followed me out into the living room.
“Emma, I’m not gonna let you throw our life away because your feelings are hurt.”
I stopped cold and turned to face him.
“Excuse me?”
“You’re acting like a child. You got fired from your job. So what? Your grandparents died. People lose loved ones all the time, and theworld keeps spinning. You barely knew those people, yet here you are acting like a kid running away from home. You need to stop this and come to your senses.”
His use of the phrase “running away from home” immediately made me think of Dan and our conversation during dinner the night before. Dan and I had both run away from home, and ran headlong into something better. I looked around the condo, and finally, my eyes landed on Teddy.
“I’m not throwing our life away.” I paused to choose my next words carefully. “I think… I think I’m saving our lives.”
“What?” He shot me a befuddled glance.
“Our relationship hasn’t been good for a long time. I thought I was taking this time away to clear my head and then maybe, after a while, I’d be ready to come back and pick up the pieces.”
“So then why are you leaving?”
“Because I don’t want this life. I thought I did for so many years, that if I just worked harder to be happy, maybe one day, I would be, but it hasn’t happened.”
“Emma, relationships are work. We are good together. We fit. Once we announce my run and you start planning our wedding, you won’t even have time to think about any of this.”
“Our wedding?” I scoffed. “Do you hear yourself?” I shook my head at him. “I just told you that I was unhappy, that I have been for a long time, and you’re still talking about our wedding. You haven’t even proposed.”
“I’m going to propose, Emma. We were always going to get married. What are you even saying? This isn’t you. Where’s my practical, logical girlfriend who didn’t give a fuck about all this sappy shit?”
“It’s not that I didn’t care, Teddy. You never did it and I never asked you to, but everyone deserves to be happy.”
He rolled his eyes. “What is it going to take for you to stay? You want to go to couples counseling? I’ll go. You want me to propose? I’ll go buy a goddamn ring right now. But, Emma, this shit has to stop. Shit has to go back to normal. You can’t throw this at me right now. We’re so close, baby. So close to getting everything we’ve ever wanted.”
“No, Teddy.” I shook my head and rolled my suitcase past him. He needed a new line. This one was tired, and I wasn’t planning to stick around for the encore. “Again,you’reclose to getting everythingyou’veever wanted, and I was along for the ride. Now I think it’s time for me to get off.”
“Is there someone else?” he asked.
