“What happened with Teddy?”
“We hit a little bit of a rough patch,” I answered quickly.
“Hmm” was his only response.
“—well, since everything, I’ve been staying at the farm, trying to decide whether I should sell it or keep it…” I hesitated, “trying to learn more about my grandparents…”
There was a long pause before my father spoke again.
“George and Harriet were good people. They treated me like a son, and they loved you…” he paused again, and I wondered if he was thinking about Annie, “very much.”
“So what happened? Why don’t I know them? Why haven’t you and Mom spoken to them for almost twenty-five years?” I was tempted to tell him about the farm and what I’d read in the journal, but I had to think about Dan and all of the other people in town whose lives now depended on my next decision.
“Emma…” He let out another heavy sigh. “That’s… that’s a conversation for you to have with your mother. They’re her parents, and it’s… it’s a lot to talk about.”
“I’ve tried to talk to her.”
“Baby, I don’t know what to tell you.”
You could start with the truth, I thought angrily.
“There’s so much I don’t know. I grew up with three giant pieces of my life missing, and I’m just trying to complete the puzzle.”
The other end of the line was completely silent. There wasn’t even the sound of my father’s deep, even breaths, and I immediately knew it was because I’d alluded to the three we don’t speak of: my grandmother, my grandfather, and Annie.
“Dad?” I whispered into the phone. My eyes were starting tosting at the thought of causing my dad the slightest amount of pain. My childhood was spent walking on eggshells around the subject of my sister. While I grew up essentially an only child, Annie’s presence hung like a heavy weight that pressed on all of our hearts. My mother would become angry and evasive if Annie was ever brought up, but my father would always get quiet and turn inward. I don’t know why I would have thought the years would have had some effect on my father’s reaction. Her absence was a wound that, after over twenty years, was still in no danger of healing and hid a mystery that I might never be able to solve.
“Listen, sweetheart. I have to let you go.”
“No, Dad. I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have anything to apologize for, baby girl. I was on my way out the door when you called anyway.”
“Golf game?” I attempted to change the subject to at least end our call on a lighter note than the one I’d inadvertently played.
“You know it.”
“Tiger Woods better watch out.”
“Not with my knees.” Dad chuckled, and a tear that was equal parts relief and sadness rolled down my cheek. “Do you have enough money, Em?”
“Yes, Dad. You always taught me,Save money…”
“…and money will save you,” we finished in unison.
“Plus, I own an entire farm.”
“Yes, you do, sweetie; and you’re gonna be just fine.”
There was another pause.
“I love you, Dad.”
“I love you, too, baby girl.”
My conversation with my dad, though short, completely drained me emotionally. I’d need at least another forty-eight hours before I could even think about handling a conversation with my mother. The thought of reading more of my grandfather’s journal didn’t appeal to me, even though I was still curious. Most of all, I was hungry.
I found myself back at Greenie’s, mostly because of the waffles, but also because I was hoping for more information about my past from Erica. Once again, Melissa, the tiny hostess with the mostest, seated me in my favorite booth, but this time her mother was cordial when she took my order.
