“Like a therapist?”
“Maybe,” Samara said. “I was thinking about it, and what you’re describing is something like what some people like me deal with.”
“People like you?”
“The obsessive thoughts,” she said. “Mine usually relate to food, but there are more that I have sometimes. I talk to someone when things get bad, but I haven’t been going regularly recently. I just met up with my own therapist yesterday, though, and I brought you up. I didn’t tell her your name or anything, but I talked to her about some of the things you’ve mentioned to me. She didn’t diagnose you with anything, of course – she wouldn’t do that without seeing you – but she said it does sound like it could be a form of OCD.”
“You think I have OCD?” Dana asked.
“I don’t know. I can just relate to it.” Samara shrugged a shoulder again before she stood and sat down next to Dana on the bed, resting her head on Dana’s shoulder. “The fear, the worry, the need to control – I feel that all the time. Mine just manifests differently.”
Dana nodded and asked, “Would your therapist see me, or is that weird? Should I find my own?”
“My therapist is in LA, but she’d probably do a video session, if you want.”
“Can I just go see her when I go back?”
Samara lifted her head and asked, “Go back?”
“When you’re done in Vancouver.”
Samara smiled and said, “That’ll be a few months from now.”
“I know.”
“And you’ll be visiting?” she asked, hoping she wasn’t pushing her luck.
“Probably for the first trip back there.”
“The first?”
Samara couldn’t stop herself from smiling wider.
“I was thinking you could help me find an apartment. Of course, I wouldn’t move until after the wedding, assuming they’re still doing that in April. Lainey isn’t sure she’ll be ready by then, but I’m confident. She’s determined to finally marry Paige. I bet she’ll make physical therapy her bitch.”
Samara laughed and said, “So, you’d be searching for a place to live in Los Angeles?”
“I think so. My paycheck from the movie will keep me out of debt until I can find a job there while I audition for new roles.”
“You’re not joking, right? You’re serious?” she checked. “I got my hopes up when you were talking about how much you liked LA before… I get that you had to come back for your sister, but you’re serious, right? You want to move thereandaudition?”
“I’ve let whatever it is inside me get in the way of what I wanted my entire life. I don’t think I realized it fully until I talked to my sister today, but she’s right. I know I can go back to catering. I can stay here and visit my parents, but they’ll be fine without me. They were fine before I was born. Lainey has the love of her life, and Paige will take care of her. She has been for a while now, after all. It’s probably one of the reasons I’ve been so miserable and lonely since they met. I can stay here and still feel that.” Dana turned to her. “Or, I can go after what I want and be withwhomI want.”
“I hope that’s still me.”
“Well, it’s not Kathy.”
Samara laughed, feeling the tension leave her body, and asked, “What about Vancouver?”
“What about it?”
“Can you visit while I’m there?”
“I don’t even have a passport.”
“Not even the card that lets you into Canada?”
Dana shook her head no.
