Working in academia had its drawbacks, especially in the UK, butmeritmattered a great deal more in Europe than America. Titles and money could get you into the right schools overseas but you had to prove yourself if you wanted to lecture and run grant-funded projects. Money wasn’t thrown at pampered brats and scholars treated each other with respect.
At least, most scholars did. Respect was a case-by-case matter for Elio and most of his peers weren’t worth his time. Milo deserved Elio’s respect and he was worth the time, but he wouldn’t work anywhere else. With little choice but to accept it, Elio had left the rest in Milo’s hands and returned to Muriel’s.
It was surprising that Milo had chosen a Millennial Prize Problem for their first project. Elio wanted them to make a statement and establish themselves as a teamandfor Milo to gain some confidence. But this was a bold choice and would draw a lot of attention if they could solve it. The $1 million prize would also give them more freedom and funding for more ambitious projects.
Elio already had an extremely ambitious problem for them to solve—one he had been working on for close to a decade—but he had to be sure that Milo was ready and could be trusted. And trust went both ways. Elio had to earn Milo’s trust before asking him to take such ahugeprofessional leap of faith. They would both be labeled as madmen and possibly laughed out of the institute and the wider physics community,unlessthey were successful.
That was a tremendous gamble for both of them and as much as Elio wanted to rush, he would have to bide his time and endure Starlight. He had to if he wanted to work with Milo and Elio had gone as far as he could on his own. He kept hitting walls with his calculations and there wasn’t enough research on quantum time theory but solving the problem of polynomial time, versus exponential time through P versus NP could be the breakthrough Elio needed.
And if they could solve that, it could act as a professional and reputational ice-breaker before Elio’s true intentions were discovered. What was another year or two if Elio could mastertimeand finally get what he truly wanted?
Logically, it would be nothing, but Elio felt a familiar pang of grief and longing and went back to his phone. Matteo would understand best and his voice or presence usually calmed Elio, but the horrific tableau in Truman’s kitchen was still too fresh in his mind. Theo and Doobie were off on Mondays and probably busy with their dogs or each other, so Elio gave in and dialed Leo’s number.
“Wie geht’s, Eli?” Leo answered after the first ring.
Tense as usual and bracing himself for bad news. Leo could never understand and assumed that most of Elio’s actions were done out of spite, or in spite of him and the House of Hessen. In reality, Elio didn’t give a damn about the title or the Foundation and rarely gave either any thought. The margraviate was so minor compared to Elio’s work and had only caused his family pain and suffering before Leo inherited the title. Leo was still suffering under the Foundation’s thumb, but at least he had Jonathon.
“I’m not in trouble and you won’t be getting a bill for damages.”
“Wunderbar! How are you settling in at Muriel’s and the institute?” Leo asked and Elio pushed out a groaning sigh.
“The apartment is fine but the rest is just as fucked as I had imagined and I was right to stay on the other side of the ocean.”
“Let’s not be hasty,” Leo replied in distress and it sounded like he had fumbled the phone. “You’ve only been there for a few weeks.”
“I know exactly how long I’ve been here, Poldi.” Elio rolled his eyes and wished Leo had a little more faith. “I’m not irrational. I was just wondering?—”
“Icannotget you access to the Hadron Collider. I don’t know that I would if I could,” Leo said carefully.
“That’s not why I called,” Elio snapped back, then rememberedwhyhe had called and that his brother loved him,even when he was at his worst. “Sorry. I just wondered if Mamma and Papà ever said anything about why they chose Elio for me.”
“For your name?” Leo clarified, his tone lowering with concern.
Elio already knew what Leo’s answer would be, but every now and then, another forgotten clue would emerge from his brothers’ memories. Being an infant when his parents died, Elio had no memories of his own and had to rely on Leo’s and Theo’s to know and understand them.
“You and Theo have traditional Austrian names. You were named after Papà’s side but Matteo and I have Italian names.”
“Ah.” Leo made a thoughtful sound. “I think that the rift wasn’t as final when Theo and I were infants but the relationship between our parents and the rest of the von Hessens had deteriorated a great deal by the time Matteo was born.”
“I know about all of that. Butwhydid they name me Elio? Did they know something about my future or did either of them have a secret passion for physics or astronomy?”
“Eli… This again?” Leo laughed softly. “Our parents were both very smart people and Mamma could play any instrument and she was an amazing baker, but they couldn’t have known that you’d be a genius and change the world of physics.”
“How can you be certain?”
“I can’t,” Leo confirmed. “There’s a lot about our parents that I don’t know and conversations I wasn’t privy to. But Papà studied finance and history before he fell in love and left the von Hessens. He loved the opera and Mamma and he worked as an accountant to support us and keep me and Theo in school.”
“Gah! I know all of this!” Elio complained as he stomped towards the dry erase board. “But there had to be a reason.”
“Why? Do you need to put more pressure on yourself?”
“That’s not—” Elio started butit was. Whenever he was most frustrated with his work on the time problem, Elio would think about his parents and wonder if his name was a sign or a message. Was this the path they had wanted for him and was he letting them down?
“What I do know is…” Leo began, his voice catching with emotion and bringing tears to Elio’s eyes. “Is that theywantedyou. You weren’t planned and they had thought that Matteo would be their last, but you came along six years later and we were all so happy. I have always suspected that Mamma knew you would be a handful but wanted you to be the center of our family’s universe. It’s why I put up with all of your nonsense.”
That was why Elio would always tolerate Leo’s meddling and tried not to disappoint him. Too much. “Thank you. Being here feels like a mistake but I’ll make it work with Starlight.”
“You don’t have to stay,” Leo noted gently. “I haven’t been secretive about how pleased I am that you’re with Matteo and trying something new, but you can always come back, Sternchen.”
