Shit! Kane. I risk a look at him, expecting to find a scowl of disgust on his usually happy face, only to find his nose buried in his phone. “What are you doing?”
“Looking up drinks. I’m going to school you both in this game.” If that comment didn’t come from underneath a mop of pink hair, I’d have sworn Jace said it, since it’s exactly the kind of thing he’d do.
That’s one explanation for liking both of them, they both want to win.
I haven’t seen this competitive side of Kane before, but it makes my chest swell with pride as it sends a jolt of lust straight to my balls.Fuck me.How am I supposed to work side-by-side with someone I admireandwant to sleep with? Again.
Deacon arches an impressed brow and looks at Kane’s phone over his shoulder. “This one should be your signature drink.” He points at the screen.
“Pink Panty Dropper. No points for originality, but at least it looks refreshing.”
I choke back a laugh as Deacon worms his way into the seat on the other side of Kane, which turns out to be a good thing since it makes things between him and I lessintimate. Even though we’re using dirty drink names to make ridiculous sentences.
Eventually, our conversation turns to the bike park, and we tell Deacon about our plan to build at least one green run before the summer ends. I had hoped that little teaser wouldn’t get him too excited—there’s still a lot that needs to fall perfectly into place to meet that timeline—but Kane’s amped and he picks up on it. Only I’m not sure it’s purely his excitement that has him hanging on his every word.
Kane isn’t just a vision in a delicately masculine way, he lives and breathes biking, something that lights him up from the inside. That enthusiasm is highly appealing, so much so it makes me wonder if I was off base earlier when I thought Deacon might be trying to flirt with him.
I don’t like that one bit.
But there’s not a damn thing I can do about it unless I want to risk things with Jace. Or come out in the worst possible way. How is this my life right now?
A few weeks ago, I felt grateful for the experience of meeting and sleeping with each one of these incredible men. Separately. Now, I’m wondering how much it will hurt Kane to find out I’ve chosen Jace.
Wait a minute. He won’t even know that, because no one does. No one will unless I come out of the closet, which I’ll do if things with Jace keep going the way they are. Until then, Kane’s probably going to think I just don’t wanthim, which makes me sort of sick to my stomach.
Maybe being lonely was better, or at least it was less complicated.
Once we’re done eating, Deacon heads off to The Underground, scouting for a hookup no doubt, although he promises to keep an eye out for Ryder since I’m sort of working.
I’ve barely seen my childhood best friend over the last week or so since my personal and professional life have suddenly become complicated, and I feel pretty shitty about that since his life came to a screeching halt about the same time. I feel even shittier about the fact Ryder still has no idea I’m gay, and while no one from this town does, I have a feeling that revelation will be especially hard for Ryder to swallow.
The one thing Ryder loves—loved—most in this world was his brother. It’s fair to assume Ryder’s unconditional love for his brotherwould extend to me, and I suspect when he learns I didn’t tell him about my sexuality he’ll take it as a sign I didn’t trust him, even though I had no way of knowing just how accepting he would be several years ago.
Just thinking about that conversation turns my stomach.
Still, it’s clear Ryder is hurting, and despite the fact we’ve drifted apart, he remains one of my closest friends. I make a mental note to check on him as soon as possible to see how he’s doing without his brother as I settle the bill.
Outside, Kane and I make our way to the bus stop—the one he needs to head back to the resort is a different line than the one that goes to my house—and I’m hoping being on separate routes will make this a quick goodbye.
“You know which bus to take back to the resort, right?” I ask him as we take seats on a bench to wait.
“I do, although I was sort of thinking I didn’t have to go there right away.” He bites his lip in the most adorable way, and I have to grip the slats on the seat beneath me to keep from leaning toward him and taking it between my teeth.
Bracing for the worst, I take a cautious breath, which is probably the worst thing I could do.
“You don’t feel the same.” His chest deflates as his gaze drops to the ground.Shit.
Knowing it’s a risk, I loosen my grip on the bench and stretch my arm out, brushing my fingertips under his chin so he has to lift his head and meet my eyes. Once he does, I drop my hand.
“Please don’t think that. It’s just… you’re my boss now, and I want this job as much as you do. I don’t want to cross any lines that shouldn’t be crossed.”At least that’s partly true.
“Didn’t we already do that?” he whispers.
“We could make that argument, but I’m not sure we should. We both have a lot riding on our jobs.” The fact that our mutual boss, Carter, is dating a man who used to work for him could come back to bite me since it suggests workplace romances are okay, but he is the friggin’ owner of the resort and I’m not. That’s what I’ll say if Kane calls me on it.
“I guess that makes sense.” Kane’s shoulder rises listlessly. “And since we pretended to be strangers earlier today it would be awkward to try to explain we had a prior…whatever it was.”
“Yeah, we sort of backed ourselves into the corner with that. We should probably make talking about our sexuality off-limits too. I mean, that’s not typically something you cover with your new boss day one.” My laugh is just as humorless as it sounds.
