Startled, I flinched but didn’t jump back, forcing myself to remain calm. “Vivienne, are you okay? Can I get you something?”
“Have you not heeded the words of your queens?” Her once wild, wiry hair lay smooth in ringlets against her shoulders. The color in her cheeks had returned, her eyes clear of that eerie white usually present when she received some sort of vision. She looked almost sane.
Staring into her eyes, I searched for a hint of context, any sort of clue as to what she could be implying. “Of course I obey my queen, Vivienne. I?—”
She released my arm and whipped her finger in front of my face, stopping me. “Not one but two queens gave you a command, Captain. You have a critical role to play in this war. Or have you forgotten so quickly of the vows you made to your queens?”
I almost didn’t know what to say. Vivienne never spoke so bluntly or called me out for my actions. How she even knew of any vows I’d made, I’d never know—probably didn’t want to know. That was two people in one day putting me in my place.
Standing straighter, I replied, “I always honor my vows.”
Vivienne stared at me. Not backing down, finger still raised. She sighed and moved to cup my cheek, nodding like she wanted me to say something else.
I watched her, seeing her take in parts of me that I wasn’t sure I knew I was sharing. Until finally, taking a deep breath, I whispered what I had been too afraid to say out loud these last few days. “I’m afraid I’ve lost her.”
Vivienne shifted on her feet as the white-haired woman approached behind her, laying a hand on her shoulder. Tilting her chin, Vivienne looked me in the eyes. “The only thing worthy of your fear is never finding out what could be. You must do your part and trust the Fates if we hope to survive. Be the leader your father died knowing you’d be. Be the captain not one, but two queens entrusted with their lives.” She patted my cheek once.
“I can’t leave without knowing she’s safe,” I confessed.
Vivienne smiled at me. “Be the man Lana chose as her closest confidant and friend. The one stronger than any darkness. Let her return to the army she commanded you to obtain.”
Without another word, she somehow managed to move the trays in the room and close the door before I could even blink.
Vivienne was right. I needed to be the man my father raised me to be. The man I’d vowed to be for Queen Roxana. The man Lana, my best friend, myqueen, needed me to be.
Determined and with a newfound sense of purpose, I practically ran down the stairs and back into the dining area of the inn, where I had last seen my friends.
Kalliah and Corbin sat at a small wooden table, eating their rabbit stew in silence. Their bodies hunched and tired. The toll of the unknown weighing heavy on their shoulders. We wouldn’t sit around any longer. We couldn’t.
“We move out tomorrow, Corbin,” I said. “Tomorrow we begin building an army for our queen.”
Chapter 5
Lana
With the safe house empty, we didn’t dare linger for longer than necessary.
We agreed to rest for the remainder of the evening, even if it was only for a few hours.
Besides, Raya still hadn’t fully recovered, a fact worrying us as each hour passed.
Jax settled Raya in an upstairs room, hovering over her like a worried mother hen. Storm and I slept on couches downstairs, just in case anyone decided to appear. I don’t think he ever truly slept though.
My mind refused to stop spiraling so I could rest. I replayed the moments in Mount Legion, unable to let go of the simple mistake I’d made trying to protect the amulet. How could I have been so foolish as to let my blood touch it?
How different would things have been if I had taken just a moment to think?
No.
If I let these thoughts consume me, I’d live forever in pain. I could not belittle myself anymore. What was done had beendone and none of us could afford to look backward. We had overcome greater odds before as a unit. We would do so again. Together, we’d find a way to get Kade back and keep both of our kingdoms safe.
Only once in these few hours did the desperatetugof wanting to be close to Kade have me reaching for the door handle to leave the safe house and return to his side. The devastating weight of missing him pressed against my chest, even though it had only been a few days. I badly craved the warmth and weight of his shadows. Their sweet smell of faded rainstorms and crisp morning air.
The sting of burning metal met my fingertips and I yelped, suddenly realizing I had reached for the doorknob. Storm grunted from his blankets a few feet away. “Serves you right.”
“I’m sorry,” I whispered, but he didn’t answer. He didn’t have to.
With Storm’s magic sealing me into the house, I finally allowed exhaustion to win, and my eyes closed before I even hit the makeshift bed.
