“Is this okay?” I stroke him once, over the long length of him.
“Fuck yes.”
I grasp him tighter in my hand and he does the work for me, thrusting into my fist, even as he continues to stroke me, bringing me to the brink before backing off again and again until I want to scream.
“Please,” I finally whimper. “Don’t stop, Jack.”
And he doesn’t. I tighten around his fingers for the second time, crying out in release. Jack pumps into my hand harder, shuddering out his own release a second later.
We collapse back onto the pillows, Jack taking my hand in his, locking our fingers together as we catch our breath. Once his breathing has steadied, Jack climbs out of bed, disappearing into the bathroom and returning a second later with a damp washcloth. We clean ourselves up and he slides back under the covers, tucking me into his embrace.
We don’t say another word. We don’t need to. We just wrap ourselves around each other and fall into a blissful sleep.
I wake up first, stretching slowly and carefully, making sure I don’t stir Jack out of sleep. Moving an inch at a time, I slip out from under the covers, grabbing my shirt and panties before heading into the bathroom. I spend more time in there than I really need, low-key freaking out about walking back into my room and finding it empty.
Though even if I did, the farthest Jack could go is down the hall to his own room.
Because we live together. Fuck.
I spent the previous night with my lips seemingly permanently attached to my roommate’s. Not just my roommate, my landlord. The man who could decide to kick me out of his house at any time. If and when I mess this up, he can send my entire carefully constructed financial-spreadsheet life plan into total upheaval.
And yeah, I realize Jack knows me fairly well by now—I’m not exactly shy—but what are the chances his perfect self can actually handle my asshole self for the long term?
My heartbeat picks up speed and my chest tightens.
I flick down the lid of the toilet and collapse onto the seat, tucking my head between my knees.
I really fucked it up this time.
I’m 1,000 percent sure Jack is currently scrambling back to his room and will spend the rest of his day—the rest of his life—trying to avoid me, forever regretting his one-time lapse in judgment that ended with his hands down my pants.
I squeeze my thighs together, the memory alone enough to make me ache for him.
Once I’ve given Jack plenty of time to get the hell out of dodge, I creep back into my room. He’s still there, still asleep, still burrowed under my covers. He’s on his stomach, his hands tucked under the pillow. If I didn’t know better, I might think he’s smiling in his sleep. But that can’t possibly be. There’s no way he could truly be happy after what happened between us.
Climbing back onto the bed, I gingerly balance my weight so as not to shift the mattress. I shimmy over to the farthest edge, putting the absolute maximum space between us, bringing the covers up to my chin and watching him sleep like the total fucking creeper I am. This might be the last time I see his face at peace. Surely once he opens his eyes and sees us in the same bed, said beautiful face will be overcome with horror.
While Jack enjoys his peaceful slumber, I mentally start making a checklist of all the things I’ll need to do when he asks me to move out.Find a place to live, obviously, and it’ll have to be cheap. Ask the bar about taking on some extra shifts since I’ll never again in my life have the good fortune to pay so little in rent. Possibly see about renting a studio space as well since any apartment I can afford on my bartender salary is going to be tiny and definitely won’t have room for things like floral coolers.
I’m so lost in thought, I don’t even notice Jack’s eyes flutter open.
“Why are you so far away?” His voice is groggy with sleep, all low and rumbly and sexy as fuck.
Which is just rude, since I know he’s about to tell me to leave his perfect house and never come back.
“Sadie?” He flips over onto his back and holds out his arm. “What are you doing over there?”
“Giving you space.” I curl myself up into a little ball, wanting to be as small as possible.
“I don’t want space. Get your sexy ass over here.” He grins, but it fades quickly. “Shit. Unless you don’t want that. I can go.” He tosses the covers off, revealing his still-very-much-bare chest.
“Jack, it’s your house. I can go.” I unfurl my limbs and slip out from under the covers. “I can stay with Harley and Gem until I find a new place. Or maybe Harley will just move in with Nick and I can take her room. That’d actually be best-case scenario, even though I don’t want to push them into something they’re not ready for, obviously. But I’m that desperate for a place to live, so knowing me, I’ll push away.”
Jack stands at the foot of the bed as I start riffling through the drawers of my dresser, not even sure what I’m looking for.
“You want to move out?”
I stop riffling, but I don’t turn to look at him. “Of course I don’twant to move out. But I also don’t want you to have to feel like you have to let me stay here.”
