“It’s not that,” I snapped.
They all stared at me.
I slapped the lid of my laptop down. “I don’t need my girlfriend’s pity.” I stuffed my glasses back on my face. “I don’t need my twenty-five-year-old girlfriend and her mother to stand up for me. I don’t need them to fight for my right to paint fuckinggame pieces or get home-cooked food from Mama like I’m seventeen. I don’t need Ruby to defend her boyfriend who never went anywhere and got by in life thanks to his family name.”
The silence could’ve choked me.
“I see.” Summer was the first to speak. She had one leg crossed over the other under the table, bobbing her foot, a line of concentration bisecting her forehead. “It’s not Ruby or her dad. It’s how the whole situation made you feel.”
That damn pity I hated pulled at Autumn’s features. “You went back to being that kid who just stood and took it from Bobby. And the man who stayed on the high road after Katrina claimed you were an overgrown mama’s boy who lived in the basement.”
No one talked about how the high road was full of losers. The respect I’d thought I’d get being the bigger guy hadn’t been there. There were no awards for turning the other cheek. Sometimes you just got dick punched again.
“Well, if that’s what you think about yourself, I guess I’m the same.” Teller stretched back and slapped his stomach. “I’ve been eating Mama’s fried chicken and rice all damn week.”
“Scarlett made her breakfast burritos this morning,” Tate added. “Hell, we all live on land given to us by our parents. Is that what you think of us?”
“Before you say I don’t play games,” Teller said, “I have to admit to losing an hour every night on that new word game Jenna mentioned last week.”
“Oh!” Wynter poked her finger in the air. “That one—yes. I caught Myles playing that the other day. He played too long and didn’t get the lawn mowed before it rained.”
“Fine, I get the point,” I said through gritted teeth, hating to admit that what they said did make me feel better. We were a close family, but I couldn’t see behind their closed doors to what habits they spent their time on. But we all worked for thefamily’s companies and greedily accepted Mama’s food. “None of that changes how Bobby Morgan is a self-made man who sort of turned his life around on his own. He’s going to use that to undermine me to Ruby.”
“Is she worth it?” Junie asked. Ruby was worth everything. I didn’t answer, just glowered at the phone’s speaker. “Is she worth standing up to Bobby until death do you part?”
“We weren’t getting married,” I said.
“That’s not answering the question,” Teller retorted. He swept an arm in my direction. “Are you happier like this?”
I bit my tongue and glanced away.
“Is it really worth going home alone every night to never have to see Bobby again?” Summer asked.
They weren’t going to let up if I didn’t answer. “She loves her dad. I’m not going to ruin that relationship.”
“He would be the one doing that if he alienates her,” Autumn pointed out.
Tate shook his head. “Maybe it’s not that. Maybe it’s the possibility that she might listen to her dad and behave like Katrina. The worst of both worlds.”
Acid in my stomach churned. The breakfast sandwich I’d had hours ago was like gravel in my gut. “She’d never behave like Katrina.”
Ruby would never do that.
What if she realized how much better she could do? I’d rather make a break before it destroyed me completely.
The crack in my chest was enough of a death blow.
“Ah,” Teller said on an exhale. “But she could leave like Katrina. That’s the real fear. And with Bobby as her dad, that makes it all the more likely in that big brain of yours. You ran the risk calculation through some spreadsheet formula you designed and it wasn’t absolutely zero. So you bailed.”
His claim was a metal hoop around my chest, cutting off my breathing as if I was the barrel getting ready to be shelved for years. Had I done exactly what Teller claimed? “I don’t know,” I said woodenly.
“I bet she’s worth knowing for sure,” Autumn said, her voice gentle, like I was one of her distraught students.
“She’s worth everything,” I said without thinking first. Becauseof courseRuby would never hurt me on purpose. She wasn’t like her dad. Nor was she like any ex I’d ever had—except that she was an ex now. “I fucked up.”
The truth was choking me. I had epically jacked up any chance I had with her.
“It’s not too late,” Teller said. “All you have to do is talk to her?—”
