“Easier?”
“Yeah.” His eyes glittered from the dash lights and we both contemplated the area for a few moments. “It no longer feels like a penance. Instead, I remember other times I drove past here. With him, you know. When we’d go fishing and come back to hang.”
“He was a good guy, and he loved his family. I think... I think all of this would’ve broken him.”
“Yeah,” he said roughly.
I tried to summon memories of riding with Eli to the cabin, but tonight, they weren’t coming.
“You’ve been quiet,” he said.
I had been subdued since Rhys had stopped at the table with his adorable daughters. He’d chatted with Jonah about buying Adam and Vera’s house. I couldn’t shake something Jonah had said.
She’s not getting the kids or the pink from me, so I’m glad you and your girls can help her out.
What was I supposed to do about that? Tonight had been our start. Our official announcement to the world outside of our families that we were together. And then he’d proclaimed that he wasn’t having kids.
Was he talking about at the moment? What about the future?
How long did I wait to find out?
Autumn’s advice rang through my head loud and clear. I had to talk to him.
I didn’t care to do it at the accident site, but perhaps it was a sign. This was the spot where our lives had been forever altered—his more than mine.
“Do you want kids?” I asked, my voice coming out small. I had to twist my fingers together or I wasn’t going to leave skin around my cuticles.
“What?”
“You told Rhys you weren’t giving your mom grandkids. Did you mean forever?”
A small laugh escaped him in a puff, then he caught my expression. Did I look as crestfallen as I felt? “I’m almost forty, sunshine.”
“That doesn’t mean you can’t have kids.”
“I’ve never had a long-term relationship, so no, I never planned on it.” This time his laugh was scornful. “What kind of dad would I be? I can barely get on the floor with them.”
I was cutting off my circulation like he’d done earlier in Curly’s.
“I can’t teach them how to hunt or fish?—”
“You can.”
He firmly shook his head. “Not like I would’ve been able to.”
I studied him. He had a thriving furniture-building business. He lived alone in the mountains. Any blame on his mobility was a convenient excuse. “People with all sorts of limitations raise kids.”
His jaw flexed and he punched the pickup into gear. When he pulled away, I couldn’t help but feel that he’d left that spot changed again.
“What do you want from me?” His hand was tight on the wheel, his hard gaze stabbing the windshield. “We’re dating. I’m getting out.”
“I want to know where this is going. Where arewegoing?”
He maneuvered a turn and the headlights bounced off trees, but he kept his speed under control. “I thought we were having fun together.”
“We are.” I sighed. My heart ached and tears were putting hot pressure behind my eyes, but I wasn’t crying. Yet. “Is this what you want?”
“I want you.” He turned up his driveway. The shop glinted in the dark.
