“Damn, you’re like Cher.” I nudged her gently, and her laugh crinkled the skin around her fatigued eyes.
“I bet Blair only knows what her signature looks like with your last name, honey. She’s loved you for longer than you realize, and she’ll be back. She’s gotta set herself—and your future family—up for success first.”
“No way Blair’s taking my last name. Knowing her, our kids are going to be hyphenated.Although,there are worse names out there than Hart-Wells, I guess.”
Her exhale rattled, so I turned to make sure she was okay. Quickly wiping the wetness on her washed-out cheeks, she licked away a tear clung to her lip.
“What’s up?” I asked.
She coughed quietly into her elbow, then dried the last of the tears dampening her eyelashes. “I hope you two have the perfect wedding one day. All the Hart-Wells babies you dream of. And…” Her voice cracked. “I hope you have all the happiness your dad and I have had, andmore.”
“Mom…” The words caught in my throat. Torn between wanting to argue that she’d be around for my future wedding and kids, and knowing all too well that she wouldn’t be.
“You have no idea how happy it makes me to know you found your person, and I got to live long enough to see it.”
She slung an arm around me, and I leaned into it, resting my head in the hollow of her shoulder. Her gentle heartbeat and theHappy Daystheme song creating a core memory deep in my soul.
“Honey, I have something I want you to give Blair. Can you grab my jewelry box from my dresser?”
I peeled myself from her embrace, sniffling back the stinging in my nostrils. Her jewelry box was small, and didn’t have a lot in it. Mom was never the type to wear necklaces, and she didn’t even have her ears pierced. But she had a fewpieces passed down from her own mother and grandmother, so Dad hand-carved her a wooden box to keep them safe. My fingers ran over the delicate tooling when I passed it to her.
“I love having you boys, but I hate that I don’t have a daughter to give any of these things to.” She opened the box and pulled out a necklace. “This one came all the way from England when my grandmother immigrated to Canada after the First World War. It would be a shame for it to end up in a pawn shop or something.”
“I’ll give it to Blair. She’ll take good care of it.”
“No, no.” Mom shook her head, dropping the gold chain back into the box. “If she wants it, make sure she gets it. But that’s not what I need you to give her.”
Her finger slowly dug around in the small puddle of silver and gold, and she pulled out a simple gold band with a small diamond on it.Mom’s engagement ring.A smile spread across her face when she slipped it onto her ring finger.
“I haven’t worn it in ages”—she wiggled it up and down, showing it was clearly much too big for her slender fingers—“and, as much as I’m sure your brothers might be a little pissed off with you for getting to have it, it makes perfect sense. Blair’s the closest I’ve ever had to a daughter. If she wants something different, you can melt down the gold and maybe add more diamonds to fancy it up?”
“Mom, I can’t take your engagement ring. Besides, we won’t be getting married foryearsstill. She needs to finish school first.” I pushed her hand back when she tried to offer me the ring, refusing to accept it because that felt like she had given up entirely. She was handing her eighteen-year-old son a diamond ring, expecting she wouldn’t be able to give it to me when I was older. I’d never be older than eighteen in her lifetime. “If you really want her to have it, I’ll get it closer to when I’m ready to propose.”
“Honey.I’m giving the ring to you now out of necessity. I don’t know how much longer I have, or whether we’ll getanother moment like this—just the two of us. You’re my baby boy, and I’m so proud of the man you’re becoming. Ineedyou to take this. And I need you to give it to her one day, when you’re ready.”
“Mom, I—” My voice broke, tears falling in steady streams down my cheeks while I choked on pooling saliva. “I wish you could be there.”
She tucked the ring into my palm, folding my trembling fingers around the gold circle. “I will be, baby.”
Denver
An extended exhale flows out of Austin when he sits down on the sun-soaked porch steps next to me. A shaky hand reaches for the beer I offer up, and I grab my big brother by the shoulder.
“Love you.” I pinch his trap muscle with love. “Glad you found your person. You deserve this.”
Nodding, he swallows a mouthful of beer. And we sit in the heat, overlooking the massive white tent the girls spent all day yesterday decorating for the reception. The lawn’s pristine, flower beds bursting with blooms, and the morning sun blankets the Earth. I swear even the distant barn looks like somebody took a pressure washer to the exterior. This place is arguably the best it’s ever looked; you’d hardly even guess it’s a working cattle ranch.
“Wish Mom could see it looking like this,” he says.
I smile at him, watching his throat bob with a hard swallow. “She sees it, buddy.”
The air is still and quiet, save for a distant tractor engine. Nobody’s around, and his shoulders fall as he chugs the last of the beer. So I slide across the stair to sit closer, and I hug him—something I don’t think I’ve done since the day of Mom’s funeral. But it feels right in the moment and, shockingly, he doesn’t shove me away like I would’ve expected frommy prickly oldest brother. His arm slings around my shoulder, and he pats my back.
“Let’s go get you married before Filly realizes she picked the wrong brother.” I smack him on the back, encouraging him to get a move on. “Besides, you’ll be pleased to know Ididn’tfuck things up before the wedding—in fact, I convinced her to be my date.”
“Lots of confidence considering there’s four more hours to go. Plenty of time for you to screw shit up.”
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