He couldn’t be serious.
“I’m avoiding you because you were rude to me on the first day. I thought we were friends, Denny.”
“We are friends.”
“Except when you’re with your other friends,” I mumbled, swiping a leaky tear just before it slid down my cheek.
“Blair,” he breathed out my name, and his warm hands grabbed hold of my upper arms. “I didn’t mean to. They’re just…well, you know how those guys are.”
“Yeah.” I sniffled. Realizing I was crying, I wiped the back of my hand across my eyes. “I know how they are.”
“I-I’m sorry.”
“It’s okay,” I said to convince both of us. “I’m fine.”
“I can tell you’re crying. You wouldn’t be crying if you were fine.” He exhaled hard. “Okay…there’s something my mom always says when we’re too scared to fess up to something bad. It’s like a Get Out of Jail Free card. She lets us have five seconds of honesty.”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that…Pretend I broke a vase. I get five seconds where I can tell her the truth, and there won’t be any consequences or questions. Even if I was doing something I shouldn’t have, like practicing trick roping in the living room, she can’t get mad at me if I fess up during those five seconds.Butthere’s no passing the blame, so I can’t say ‘I broke it, but that’s only because Jackson told me to swing a rope inside.’ ” Denny’s hands glided down my bare arms, leaving a wake of goosebumps he thankfully couldn’t see, before falling away from me completely. “So, Blair, give me your five seconds of honesty.”
I swallowed hard, weaving together a believable half-truth in my mind. Shoving away the sentences that would be too damning. The truth was, his actions hurt me not only because we were friends, but because Denver Wells was my first real crush. Because he made my brain float, my chest ache, and my insides somersault when he was near. Because he was the first person, aside from Cassidy, who seemed togetme.
“You were my best friend all summer. I thought you wouldn’t treat me differently ’cause your popular friends were around. I know how they are…. I didn’t think you were like that. So it hurt.”
I wrapped my arms around myself in a hug, hoping to ease the shakiness in every fiber of my body, and ease the nausea bubbling in my stomach. Maybe it wasn’t the entire truth, but it was a shard of honesty. And despite Denny’s promise not to question me on it, I couldn’t help but fear how he’d react.
“Five seconds of honesty—I’m sorry.” He cleared his throat. “Okay, well…the truth is, those guys made fun of me, saying I liked you because we hung out all summer. It bugged me because…I don’t know. I guess because I thought it was obvious we’re just friends. You’re more like a sister than anything. I was a jerk to you so they’d lay off. But that was very blue cheese of me, and I’m sorry.”
Just friends. A pseudo-sister.Obviously.All those thoughts about kissing him were entirely delusional. I shook my head slowly, wiping the tears collecting on my lower lashes. “Veryblue cheese of you.”
“Can we be friends again?” he asked in a whisper.
“I don’t know. Can we? Are youallowedto be friends with me?”
I heard the smack of his lips as he opened them in the dark, maybe preparing to give another five seconds of honesty. But before the words found their way off his tongue, the closet door opened and Megan stood with a devilish grin, hoping to catch us making out.
I blinked rapidly to let my eyes adjust before meeting Denny’s own bewildered stare. And when he looked into my eyes—which were likely red and watery—his shoulders sank. I quickly reached to clean up any stray tears or dried salt with my fingertips before turning to face the crowd of partygoers. A catchy pop song played somewhere in the distance and, for a second, everyone stared at us in silence.
“You turned her down so bad you made her cry?” an older jock guy shouted from the other side of the room, clear pride and excitement in his voice.
There’s that nausea again.My mouth was wet and dry all at the same time. I could’ve run away crying, but my brain couldn’t convince my legs to move no matter how hard I tried.
Cass stood, stepping over and around people to get across the room, her eyes never leaving mine.
Then Denny cleared his throat beside me. “No. She turned me down, actually.”
Liar.Though the slack-jawed expression on Megan’s face made both me crying in front of everybody, and Denny lying, totally worth it.
“She turned me down, then got upset because I said something really rude in response—which Ididn’tmean to do, by the way,” he said. Catching him staring in my periphery, I turned to meet his apologetic half-smile. “And I’m hoping she forgives me for being a jerk.”
“I accept the apology, blue cheese.”
Blair
Strolling into the kitchen, I spot Mom in the family room watchingWheel of Fortune, as always. Sitting on the old leather sofa, her silvery-brown hair atop her head in a messy bun. When she first got her Alzheimer’s diagnosis, she kept a brave face. Now she’s firmly in stage four out of seven for the disease, with no way of knowing how long before she forgets everything and needs 24/7 care. Whether it was the door alarms, the medic-alert bracelet, her eldest daughter moving home to care for her, or a combination of factors that made her depressed, we can’t be sure. But the hopeful smile is gone.
“Morning, sweetie,” Dad says, pouring himself a cup of coffee on his way out the door.
