"You are a fool, Ralph," she said quietly, "if you believe my behavior was blameless last night. I was flirting with Lord Beauchamp, and everyone was aware of the fact except you."
His hand remained stretched out toward her. There was a momentary silence.
"No," he said gently, "that is not so, Georgiana. Why would you do such a thing?"
"Because..." She looked up at him again, her eyes blazing. Because I wanted to make you jealous so that you woulddosomething, she had been going to say. But those wide open, vulnerable eyes were looking back at her, full of trust still. And she was suddenly overwhelmed by the urge to hurt him quite viciously. She was hurting so badly herself. Let someone share her pain.
"Because I am bored!" she almost yelled at him. "Bored, bored, bored! Do you understand, Ralph? You bore me. Always so quiet and so gentle and so...so damned proper! Why should I not turn to other men for company and some excitement? Why should I not even take a lover, perhaps? Can you give me a reason? You are not even capable of making me your wife!"
And then she gazed, frozen with horror, into his eyes, which had lost their vulnerability. They had become opaque, dull. His hand was still held out before him, palm upward. He got to his feet and closed his eyes for a moment.
"Ralph," she said shakily. "Oh, please. I did not mean it. My wretched tongue! I have been in a devilish bad mood and have said what I did not mean."
He opened his eyes and looked down at her. His face was chalky white, even his lips, Georgiana noted in dismay. "You are right," he said, and she could tell what an effort it cost him to keep his voice steady. "I have not been a husband to you at all. And I am turning all your sweetness to bitterness. I wanted you as my wife. I loved you. But I had no business marrying you. I do not know the first thing about making a woman happy. I wanted to bring you happiness, and I have brought you misery. I..."
He drew a shuddering breath, but no more words would come. He stared at her in agonized silence.
"Ralph," she said, "it is not true. It is I who have been at fault."
"No!" he said harshly. "Never say that, Georgiana. I will not have you blame yourself. I must...I will..." He paused and sighed in frustration. "I have to leave. Just do not feel guilty, please. There really is no need. You did not behave with any impropriety last night."
He turned and left the room hurriedly, even as she jumped to her feet and reached out her arms for him.
Lord Beauchamp arrived at Middleton House the following afternoon just as Georgiana was about to leave. The butler, as she came down the stairs to the hallway in her pelisse and bonnet, bowed and informed her ladyship that the visitor had been shown into the drawing room but had asked specifically for her.
"Oh, bother," Georgiana muttered. "Is there anyone in the drawing room?"
"Her ladyship, ma'am," the butler replied.
By which title Georgiana guessed him to mean her mother-in-law. Gloria had gone out with her aunt in the morning to shop for her trousseau and was not expected to return before dinner. Her mother had been indisposed and unable to accompany her. But she had obviously decided that she was un-indisposed, Georgiana thought nastily. Probably the recovery had been made when she heard that her daughter-in-law was on her way out to visit her parents.
Georgiana considered continuing on her way out of the house, but she sighed and turned to climb the stairs again to the drawing room. She continued to pull on her gloves as a footman opened the double doors for her.
"Good afternoon, Mother," she said. "Is your headache better? Good day, Roger."
Lord Beauchamp was on his feet and bowing to her. "Good afternoon, Georgie," he said. "I see I have come calling at an inopportune moment. May I see you to your carriage?"
"I am going to Papa's," she said, "on foot."
"On foot? Georgiana! That will never do," the dowager said, surprised out of the icy silence with which she had received her daughter-in-law's greeting. "Would you have all our acquaintances believe that Chartleigh is too miserly to allow you the carriage?
"By no means, Mother," Georgiana said calmly. "It is a mere ten-minute walk. By the time I order out the carriage, I shall be there already."
"You are taking your maid, my dear?"
"I had not planned to," Georgiana said.
"Then allow me to escort you, ma'am," Roger said. "It will set Aunt Hilda's mind at rest to know that you are properly accompanied."
Georgiana did not look to see how the dowager had received this dubious reassurance. She smiled at Lord Beauchamp.
"I had not thought that walking would be in your line, Roger," she said. "But I shall not refuse your offer. Shall we go?"
A few minutes later they were walking along the street, her arm linked through his.
"Well, Georgie," he said, breaking the silence, "you are looking remarkably elegant. But a trifle out of sorts?"
"Oh, no, sir," she said. "Whatever makes you say so?"
