“Because of your letters?” he asked.
“Because I w-want to marry her.”
“And did she accept?”
“She w-will,” Flavian said. “I f-forgot the roses and the bended knee this time. And I forgot to c-compose an affecting speech.”
They strolled along beside the lake.
“I danced with her at Vince’s h-harvest ball last autumn,” Flavian explained. “And I have met her a few times back there.” He jutted his chin in the direction of the trees on the other side of the lake. “There is a meadow, and it is full of d-daffodils at the moment. She was trying to paint them. I met her there.”
“And the attraction is that she is very different from Lady Hazeltine, is it?” George asked.
Flavian stopped walking and looked out over the lake before closing his eyes.
“I can find peace with her,” he said.
He had not planned the words. He did notknowwhy he was drawn to Agnes Keeping. He had not thought beyond the obvious—that he wanted to bed her, though he could not really understand that either. She was very different from the females with whom he usually slaked his sexual appetites. Sexuality was not the first thing one noticed about her.
But why did he say he could find peace with her? He did not believe peace could be found in any woman. Or at all, in fact. Peace was not for this life, and he was not sure he believed in any other.
It had been stupid of him to ask her to marry him.
George stood beside him, a short distance away, silent. He always knew when to speak, when not to. What made him as he was? Had he always been thus? Or did it have something to do with his own sufferings?
Flavian laughed and listened to the harsh sound.
“P-Peace is the v-verylastthing she would find with me,” he said. “You had better w-warn her to refuse me, George.”
“Has she not already done that?”
“When I ask again, I mean,” Flavian explained. “With the roses and the b-bended knee and the flowery speech. Tomorrow.”
“I like her,” George said, “and Miss Debbins. They are unaffected ladies, living blameless lives.”
“It is a terrible fate,” Flavian said, “being a woman.”
“It can be,” George agreed. “But women tend to settle to something and somewhere better than we do. They are more inclined to accept their lot and make the best of it. They are less inclined than we are to flounder around wondering where we should go and what we should do next.”
We,he had said. Notyou. But George did notflounder, did he? And who would not be happy to accept the fate of being the Duke of Stanbrook? Or Viscount Ponsonby, for that matter.
“Do you love her?” George asked—the same question he had just asked about Velma.
“Love.” Flavian laughed shortly. “What is love, George? No, don’t answer. I am not so j-jaded that I don’t know what love is. But what is r-romantic love? This being-in-love b-business? I was head over heels in love once, but f-fortunately I grew out of the feeling. Does that mean I did not love at all?Love is not love which alters w-when it alteration finds.Where the d-devil did I hear that? Is it from a poem? Did I quote it right? Who wrote it? When all guesses fail, choose Shakespeare. Am I right?”
“One of his sonnets,” George said. “I did not ask if you wereinlove with Mrs. Keeping.”
“You asked if I l-love her.” Flavian turned his back on the lake and made for the path up to the house. The viscountess had had it constructed last year with a sturdy rail alongside it so that Vincent could walk to the lake alone whenever he chose. “I love Lady Darleigh.”
George chuckled softly. “It would be hard not to,” he said, “when one sees all she has done to make life easier for our beloved Vincent—and when one sees how very happy she has made him.”
Flavian stopped, his hand on the rail.
“Do I love Mrs. Keeping enough to m-make life easier for her? Enough to make her happy? If I do, I suppose I m-must show it by never p-proposing to her again.”
“Flavian.” George’s hand came to his shoulder and squeezed. “You do not destroy everything and everyone you love, you know. You loveus—Ben and Hugo, Ralph and Vincent, Imogen and me. You have not destroyed any of us and never will. You have enriched our lives and causedusto loveyou.”
Flavian blinked rapidly while his head was still turned away.
