Ricky had listened to what Justin had written him and then promptly disappeared. Wes and Hilda had concluded that he was coming to find Justin. Mad as it seemed, it was possibly true.Probablytrue. Had he ever mentioned Everleigh Park in Ricky’s hearing? Justin could not remember. Had he mentioned Hertfordshire? But even if he had... Well, Hertfordshire was a whole county. It covered a sizable area. How was Ricky ever going to find him? Without a man’s mature understanding? Without company? Withoutmoney or belongings? Would he even know how to find his way home if he changed his mind? Did heknowwhere he lived? Did he know it was in Gloucestershire? Justin’s first instinct was to go dashing off there himself to help Wes with the search. But what end would that serve? None whatsoever. Whatcouldhe do, then?Anything?His throat was dry. His tongue felt thick. His stomach churned.
“Bad news?” someone asked.
He looked up, frowning. His uncle and Angela were no longer in the library, he realized. Only Watley remained, still reclined in his chair by the fireplace, a finger holding his place in the book he was reading.
“A bit of a bother,” Justin said, setting a still-tingling hand down on top of the letter. “It will sort itself out. I hope you had a pleasant ride. The landscape around here is quite scenic. Have you had tea? I am sorry I was not here myself. I have just returned to the house.”
“I believe Lady Maria was having tea brought to the drawing room for whoever wanted it,” Watley said. “I came here instead for a bit of quiet. Yes, the ride was very pleasant. Good company, lovely countryside.”
“I have been showing your sister the grotto beside the waterfall out at the lake,” Justin said. “I daresay she told you I offered her marriage a few days ago and she refused.”
“Yes,” Watley said. “She did tell me.”
“I beg to inform you,” Justin told him, “that I will be renewing the offer before you leave here next week.”
“I see,” Watley said. “And does Estelle know this too?”
“She does,” Justin said. “Her answer would have been the same if I had asked again today. At least, I am almost certain it would have been. I hope to convince her over the next week that it will be worth her while to change her mind.”
He was aware of the stilted nature of his words. And of the possible offensiveness of some of them.I hope to convince her... that it will be worth her while to change her mind.But his heart was still thumping and his head was still buzzing with the knowledge that Ricky was out there somewhere, wandering about England, or even Wales if he had got himself turned about the wrong way, in the hope of finding his friend Juss. Did he even know Justin’s last name? Or his title name? Or thatJussstood forJustin?
“You plan to woo her, then?” Watley said. He had closed his book and set it down on the table beside him.
“That word makes me cringe,” Justin said. “Woo.Is that what I will be doing? I do not know. But you ought to know that I hope to marry your sister.”
“I am not her guardian,” Watley said. “Neither is my father. Estelle is her own person.”
“But you are her twin,” Justin said. “The bond is close, I believe.”
“It seems to be closer than any I have seen between mere siblings,” Watley told him. “I will not say we read each other’s mind. That would be ghastly. But we sense each other’s feelings. Well, we more than justsensethem. We feelwitheach other orforeach other. I have often tried to verbalize just what the bond is, but have always found it impossible to do, even in my own head. We do not interfere with each other, though we sometimes intervene. Thereisa difference. If through bringing up this subject you hope to enlist my help in convincing Estelle that the title Countess of Brandon would be a good one for her, I must disappoint you, I am afraid. The choice, whether yea or nay, will be hers to make.”
“If I cannot... woo my own woman, I would be a sorry excuse for a man,” Justin said. “Whether I succeed or failwill be all on me—and on your sister. I merely wanted you to know my intentions. If you believe that I am taking unfair advantage of her in my own home when I invited her here for another purpose entirely, then you may feel free to say so.”
He picked up Hilda’s letter, unfolded it, folded it again without reading any of it, set it on top of Sarah’s letter, picked it up once more, and slid itbeneathher letter. He felt nauseated.Where are you, Ricky? Are you frightened? Have you been taken up as a vagrant somewhere and locked up in a jail?
He became aware of the silence and looked at Watley, who was looking back.
“If you take unfair advantage of Estelle, she will tell you so,” Watley said. “If she chooses to marry you, she will do so. If she chooses not to, that will be that. I will neither intervene nor interfere unless your wooing should turn into harassment. I do not expect it. I am not going to turn into the heavy-handed brother either with her or with you. But I wish you would believe me when I say I am a good listener. Something in the letter you have shoved out of sight is consuming your mind and your emotions. I know whatever that letter says is none of my business, and as soon as you have told me so I will leave the library and never refer to the matter again. If I may be of some assistance to you, however, I will sit here and listen.”
It was not in Justin’s nature—or had not been for the past twelve years, anyway—to confide anything to anybody. He bore his burdens alone. He buried his feelings beneath the armor of tough stoicism he had erected about himself soon after leaving home. But earlier this afternoon—and to a certain degree at the summerhouse a few days ago—he had let the sister beneath his guard. Washe now to confide in the brother too? The man he hoped to make his brother-in-law?
“I have a friend who is missing,” he said. “There is no trace of him close to home. His brother and... sister-in-law are frantic and believe that perhaps he is trying to come to me.”
Watley was looking steadily at him, his eyebrows slightly raised.
“Ricky is thirty years old with the mind of a very young child,” Justin told him. And he went on to explain the situation as briefly and clearly as he could.
“And you are not sure,” Watley said when he was finished, “if he knows your full name and title. Or the name of your estate or what county it is in.”
“But I cannot imagine Ricky setting out to come to me if he did not have at least one or two of those answers,” Justin said. “Even if he knew all four, though, how could he possibly find me here? He has nothing with him. He has no money. And my fear is that even if he has changed his mind and decided to return home, he will not be able to find it or tell anyone exactly where he lives. I blame myself for saying I would go to see him in July and then not going.”
“What you really blame yourself for,” Watley said, “is letting him love you and loving him in return. Life can be damnable when one opens oneself to love. It can be even worse when one does not.”
“Damned if you do, damned if you do not?” Justin said. He closed his eyes and set his hand flat on top of the two letters on his desk.
“But this is not the moment for either panic or philosophy,” Watley said. “Let us think of what we cando.”
“We?”Justin opened his eyes.
