She was a little frightened if the truth were known. She did not know at first if he intended her to climb thetree so that he could stand below and lecture her again. Perhaps he hoped she would get stuck there so that he couldwalk away. And when he had first taken her by the wristand dragged her in the direction of the trees, she hadthought that perhaps he intended to continue where he hadleft off down by the stream. One never knew with Daniel.
But she climbed. The order had been almost in the nature of a dare after he had looked over the unsuitability of herclothes for such an activity and had told her to climb anyway. She was soon aware that he was coming up after her.To push her off? That was the most ridiculous thought shehad ever entertained. After thinking it, she climbed higherthan she had intended to go, and then seated herself on abroad branch, setting her back firmly against the trunk. Shewatched him come up behind her.
She would not speak. He must be the first to do that. If they must sit there in silence for an hour, then so be it. Shewas not going to say a word. She thought about two daysago—about the embrace they had shared, about his apologyand marriage proposal later. She thought about the day before when she had avoided him and everyone else too asmuch as she possibly could. And about Gussie’s disturbingwords on the way to the village. And the strange comfort offinding Daniel behind her in the churchyard and the strangenovelty of having him with her as she paid calls on some ofher friends.
But she had been right in what she had said to him on the way home, she thought. Perhaps she should not have said italoud, but she was not sorry. He had been robbed, probablyby Aunt Sarah, though she had not labored that point. Hehad been robbed of the sort of adult he would have growninto if he had not been forced into too much responsibilitytoo soon. He would still have acted responsibly. Obviouslyit was in his nature to do so. But he would also have beenas carefree and as charming as Freddie.
He climbed up onto a branch that was on a level with and almost parallel to the one she occupied and moved outalong it, turning eventually and surprising her by lyingdown full length on it, one booted foot raised, one arm behind his head. He stared upward through the higher branches of the tree to the sky.
“We used to play here as children,” he said. “Maybe not in your time. I can’t remember. And then I used to comehere alone as a boy when the rest of you were off playingsomewhere else. For hours on end I used to lie here in thisexact spot and just stare at the sky. I used to climb treeseven after I was the Viscount Yorke, you see.”
Julia hugged her knees and rested her chin on them. She said nothing. Somehow it seemed important not to say anything.
“My father was a wastrel,” he said after a lengthy silence. “Did you know that, Julia? Probably not. Children tend not to know such things, and families tend not to talkabout them. Even I did not know until after his death. Hewas vital, charming, athletic—and devoted to gaming andwomanizing. Does the description remind you of someone?He left behind him an estate so heavily mortgaged thatthere seemed almost no way of saving it, and a widow whowas embittered and anxious for the future of her children.Especially perhaps for that of her son, who resembled hisfather in both looks and character to a remarkable degree.”
Julia closed her eyes and moved her forehead to herknees. She was not sure she wanted to hear this. But shecould not stop him. Or would not do so.
“Young as I was,” he said, “I understood the situation. I understood that only I stood between my mother and my sister on the one hand and ruin on the other. More than ruinin my mother’s case. Destruction. She seems to be a strongperson, doesn’t she? She can be very harsh and opinionated. But she was very close to total collapse for a longwhile after my father’s death. I was her anchor to sanity,she used to tell me, not realizing what a heavy burden shewas laying on a boy’s shoulders. She loves me and Camillato distraction, you see. For years we were all that gave meaning to her life.”
Icame to hate you, Daniel.Julia could hear herself saying the words just a short while before. She wished she could recall them now. Oh, her wretched mouth. Shewished she had not spoken at all.
“And so I learned,” he said. “In addition to my school work I learned how to be a viscount, how to manage an estate on the verge of ruin, how to be the head of a family. Ilearned how to be the sort of man whose womenfolk coulddepend upon him. Women are the most helpless membersof our society, you know. Not through any fault or weakness of their own, but because they are at the mercy ofmen—physically, economically, in almost every way. Andmen can be blackguards.”
He stared upward at the sky until Julia thought he must have forgotten about her. But she did not think of movingor of climbing down to the ground again.
“And yes, you are right, Julia,” he said at last. “I was young. The only way I could cope with the demands of mylife was to stamp out of it everything that might have diverted me and hurt my mother and my sister. And yes, youwere always the brunt of my anger almost more than anyone else.”
“Why?” She spoke at last.
“I don’t know.” He drew his arm from beneath his head and set it over his eyes. “Perhaps because I saw you asmore helpless than most women, more at the mercy of men.There was your orphaned, dowerless state, though I alwaysbelieved that my uncle would look after you. His will wascruel to you.”
“He owed me nothing,” she said. “I had rejected all the gentlemen who showed interest in me during the Seasonthat Grandpapa financed. And all the gentlemen he broughthere for my inspection after that. He tried to see me securely established before his death.”
“And perhaps I could see you on the way to your own destruction,” he said. “The only hope for someone in yourposition seems to be to live by all the rules. You live bynone of them.”
“You exaggerate,” she said.
“Yes.” He thought for a while. “I do. Other people—the villagers and the family here—are very fond of you. Butthey have no responsibility for your future, Julia.”
“Neither do you,” she said.
“No.” He sat up at last, carefully, and looked down. “No, I don’t, do I? Are you going to be able to get down from here?”
“There are no crumbling stairs between here and the ground,” she said. “And I am not wearing slippery slippers.I have called myself all kinds of fool since that incident, bythe way. Why did I not simply take off my shoes and stockings? I would not have needed either your assistance orGussie’s. And I would not have made such a cake of myself.”
She lowered herself carefully to the branch below as she talked. But descending from a tree when one was wearing acostly and flimsy muslin was not a speedy business. Hewas waiting on the ground by the time she stepped onto thelowest branch. He reached up his arms for her, and itseemed petty to refuse his help. She set her hands on hisshoulders while he set his at her waist, and allowed him tolift her to the ground.
“Julia.” He kept his hands at her waist when she was down and standing very close to him. His face was besidehers. If she turned her head, their noses would collide ortheir mouths would meet. She did not turn her head.
“Promise me one thing. Promise me that you will not marry Freddie.”
She was almost ready to promise him the moon and a few stars for good measure, especially when she was standing like this within the aura of his physical magnetism. But nothing had really changed. He had explained things to herthat she had never dreamed of, things that helped her understand why he had changed so completely in the courseof one year and why the fun and the laughter had gone outof his life never to return. And she understood better perhaps why he had always been so hostile to her. But the hostility was still there nevertheless. And she was still in noway answerable to him.
“Freddie is not your father, Daniel,” she said. “No one is ever an exact replica of someone else. And I have made nodecision yet about whom I will marry. If anyone. I thinkperhaps I will marry no one but retain at least a part of myfreedom.”
“That is not an answer,” he said. “Promise me.”
“I can’t promise anything, Daniel,” she said.
