“Does this big pot have a cover?” asked Miss Dutton. “And we’ll need a pair of mitts. Not just a towel. Proper mitts.”
“Yes, miss, the cook has a good pair right here.” The maid reached up and pulled a pair of enormous mittens that were used to handle heavy pots that were hot. Then she bent down and retrieved the cover for the large pan and handed it over.
Miss Dutton took a large spoonful of lard and dumped it in the pot. Then she took off her dressing gown and handed it to Miss Bates, and said “Don’t want this to catch over the fire.” She then stood in her sleeveless nightgown, and opened the package to reveal two dried ears of corn. “I had to write ahead to the general store here, and ask them to find these for me. Can’t believe you English don’t have dried corn everywhere.”
She dumped the ears of corn into the pot, placed the cover on top, and carried it to the stove. “Pull my nightgown back from the stove, Elizabeth. I have to stand close and shake the pan, or it’ll burn.”
“What on earth is she doing?” the kitchen maid asked Jane. Jane only shook her head and watched in bewilderment.
Miss Dutton placed the pot on the stove and turned up the flame. For several long minutes, nothing happened. Then… suddenly… POP! Then again, and again, BANG! POP!
Mary put her hands over her ears, as Miss Darcy whimpered a bit. This wasloud. The English ladies, who were unused to the kitchens or loud noise, cringed and covered their ears, crying out in alarm as suddenly a multitude of loud bangs emanated from within the pot. The kitchen maid, who was used to the noise and bustle of the kitchens, proved unequal to her fear of the unfamiliar noise, and fled.
“Help! Please Lord, save us! Miss Dutton is murdering the young ladies in the kitchen with the devil's pistol!” Elizabeth heard the young maid shrieking as she escaped through the lower halls.
Abigail Dutton was unperturbed, standing calmly over the stove as Elizabeth bravely held her nightgown back from the fire. She shook the pan back and forth evenly, and Elizabeth could not begin to imagine what was happening inside. Thousands, millions perhaps of loud bangs and pops continued inside the pan, as they heard shouts of alarm approaching from down the halls.
Mr Darcy was readingin his dressing gown and slippers, trying to ignore the group of young men across the hall playing cards andshouting. They did this every night, and occasionally imbibed so much brandy that Darcy was amazed they had the ability to wake up and court women in the morning. He joined them a few times a week, just to be sociable. Bingley had joined them lately more often than not, for he was still piqued with Darcy for suggesting that he was inconstant.
Suddenly he heard shouts in the hall, and there was a pounding on his door. “Mr Darcy!” cried his footman, James, when Darcy opened the door. “The kitchen maid says that Miss Dutton is murdering the young ladies downstairs in the kitchen with the devil’s pistol, and there’s a terrible noise, sir! Never heard anything like it! Sounds like thousands of pistols, all at once, sir!”
Darcy ran with all haste, following the footman down the stairs, into the lower floors of the house. As he approached the kitchens, his godmother, Major Bartholomew, and two other chaperones close behind, he heard the noise that was frightening the servants, but it did not sound like any guns Darcy had ever heard. He charged into the kitchen to see Miss Elizabeth Bennet behind Miss Dutton, who stood calmly in front of the stove, shaking a large covered pot, from which all the noise was emanating. The other ladies were covering their ears and cowering in a corner, though they were all obviously quite safe.
“Miss Dutton, Miss Elizabeth, would you explain this ungodly noise!” he shouted in frustration.
Miss Elizabeth raised her eyebrows as Miss Dutton turned down the fire and removed the pot from the flame. “We’re only making a treat. Don’t get your feathers ruffled.” She looked at Mrs Darlington and said, “Sorry, ma’am. I should have warned you that we’d be a bit loud, though I believe your maid created most of the commotion. Your pot ain’t hurt though.” She removed the cover to show them the small puffs of fluffy white corn inside.
“What on earth is that?” Darcy asked in amazement as Bingley and some of the other men entered the kitchen from the other entrance and burst into drunken giggles upon finding the ladies in their nightwear.
“It’s popped corn,” answered Miss Dutton. “Try it.” She popped apuff into her own mouth and made a face, turning and taking a small handful of salt from the salt cellar behind her, then sprinkled it over the corn. “Needs salt. Now try it.”
“Popped corn? You are cookingIndian food in the middle of the night?” Darcy laughed at the absurdity of it as Miss Elizabeth crept close and sneaked one of the kernels into her mouth. Not to be outdone, he took a few and tried them himself. He grinned at Elizabeth and in unison, they said, “It is delicious!”
At length, Mrs Darlington accepted Miss Dutton’s apology, the popped corn was distributed to a number of large bowls, and the ladies returned upstairs with their treat, sending bowls with Mr Darcy and the chaperones as well. Mr Bingley and some of the other young men were quite obviously inebriated and found the scene and the sight of the ladies’ in their dressing gowns quite a bit more amusing than the situation called for. Elizabeth was unimpressed and raised her eyebrows at Jane, who refused to meet her eye.
The ladies traipsed back to the Bennets’ parlour, past the other ladies staring open-mouthed out their doors in shock at their boldness. Miss Bertram and Miss Crawford lost no time following them into their parlour, and deciding that they couldwake snakesquite as well as the gentlemen, the ladies sent for a bottle of wine and giggled and squealed late into the night.
CHAPTER 32
Elizabeth avoided Mr Darcy for another week. She changed her direction each morning when she walked, and remained in the company of the ladies, far from him in the drawing room. He still watched her constantly, and looked troubled when she caught him doing it. His godmother watched them both constantly, and so did all who had come in his party, and Elizabeth was becoming quite sick of it. It was almost enough to make her wish to retreat back to her rooms, especially after the first morning.
The morning after the ladies’ escapade with the popped corn, Mr Cartwright approached her after breakfast in the morning room and asked, “Miss Elizabeth, may I beg the privilege of a private audience?”
Before Elizabeth could think of a polite excuse to decline, the room suddenly emptied. Mrs Darlington, three ladies, and two gentlemen all disappeared before Elizabeth could object, and she found herself alone in a room with Mr Cartwright, the door slightly ajar.
“Miss Elizabeth,” Mr Cartwright began as he sank to one knee before her.
“Oh dear.” Elizabeth jumped up from her seat, “Mr Cartwright, I wish that you would not-”
“Miss Elizabeth, from the moment I met you here at Ever After End, I singled you out as the companion of my future life.” Mr Cartwright rose and followed her to the window, where she looked outside and refused to meet his eye. “But first, allow me to explain my reasons for marriage.”
He continued, “I have wished to marry for some time, Miss Elizabeth, but I waited many years, for I wished to attain the success I would require to support my wife in comfort and gentility. I have recently achieved that success.”
He turned and began to pace as he went on. “Upon accomplishing my pecuniary goals, I realised that it is now time for me to start a family with a genteel woman who will be an asset to me in all situations. I am charmed by your dowry and your little house in town, but I assure you, you will hardly need it, and may use it for your family’s care, should you wish to, and you may have all of the additional funds you require for that endeavour. You will be my sole heiress, even once our children are born. I will build a mansion with every comfort in the most fashionable area of town, and set up accounts for you at every merchant in London.”
“You assume too much sir, you must recall that I have given you no answer, nor have you asked a proper question.” Elizabeth finally fixed him with her gaze.
“What other answer can there be, but yes?” the man said arrogantly. “I think that I know you and your uncle well enough to know that you would not be embarrassed to marry a tradesman. You came here because you wanted to wed, I hardly think you will receive a better offer.”
